father was a mild man, but when he was in a temper, you didn’t want to be near him.
Muddie hovered in the background, already dressed for church in her blue skirt and white sweater, her strawberry blond hair brushed and shining. Out of all of us, she was the only one who still thought missing Mass was a mortal sin.
I didn’t say anything, but Da closed his eyes and sighed. “I told you that no good would come of it. You’ve cried so many tears for that boy, it’s a wonder we don’t have a fourth ocean.”
“Sixth,” Muddie said.
“Oh, please, just leave me alone, the both of you,” I said.
“Listen, Kitty girl, I’ve left you alone, and look what’s happened. You get your heart broken, just like —”
The pounding on the door startled us all. Da swiveled. “Is that him?”
“How should I know?”
“Open the door, Muddie,” Da said.
Muddie crossed slowly in her stocking feet and opened the door. Nate Benedict strode in, hatless, his face red.
“It’s on your head, Jimmy!” he shouted. “It’s on your head, I’m telling you. It’s your fault they did it.”
“Did what?” Da turned his guileless blue gaze on Nate. “What are you talking about? I don’t know anything except my daughter’s crying her eyes out for your boy, and it’s not the first time, either.”
“They enlisted. Billy and Jamie. Last night.”
This was not what any of us were expecting to hear.
“Jamie’s underage —” Da started.
“Well, apparently he was able to convince them he’s nineteen.” Nate shook his finger at Da. “This is his fault. It’s your pansy of a son, wanting to be around other boys, and dragging my Billy along …”
For a moment, we all stood staring at Nate, as though if we tried hard enough we’d be able to read his words in the air and have them make sense. Confused, Muddie looked at me. I shook my head, not understanding, either. Jamie? He was saying that Jamie … I couldn’t get my mind around what he was saying. Jamie wasn’t one of those milquetoasts from school. He was strong and big and athletic.
Da’s skin was mottled. “Get out of my house! You can’t be saying that about my boy!” Da started toward Nate, furious, and got his hands on his lapels. Smaller than Nate, not nearly as strong, he was still able to shove him back toward the door.
“Open your eyes! Your boy has corrupted him! He doesn’t know what he’s doing!”
“My boy has corrupted yours?”
“I can’t get him out of this, do you understand? He’s lost.” Nate was in the doorway now, staring at us blindly. “I’ve lost my boy!”
Da pushed him out the door and shut it. Then he sagged against it. He seemed to be gathering himself for the simple act of breathing. Eventually, he looked up and met my eyes.
“What do you know about this?” he asked.
“About what? I don’t understand.”
“He’s saying that … your brother” — Da seemed to have to force the words out — “is unnatural.”
“It’s stupid,” I said. “Jamie is Billy’s best friend. That’s all.”
Muddie, pale and trembling, backed up against the wall. “It was a terrible thing to say. We should pray.”
“Go ahead and pray — it won’t change anything,” I said. “Da, I don’t know what he meant. Billy and I had a fight last night. I sent Jamie after him to help him. They’re pals, they’re friends — you know that.”
“So there’s nothing in it.”
“Of course not. Billy’s in love with me! Mr. Benedict is just crazy, and he’s taking it out on Jamie. Did you hear what he said? They enlisted. You have to go and tell the army he’s only seventeen. You can get him out. Go to the enlistment office and tell them. You can fix this for Jamie.”
Da didn’t nod, or say a word. It was like he didn’t hear me. He went off to sit at the kitchen table.
“What are we going to do?” Muddie whispered.
“It’ll come out all right in the end,” I said. “We’ll straighten it out, and Jamie will come home.”
“Did you break up with Billy? Oh, Kit. And you were going to marry him!”
I didn’t want to see Muddie’s tears. I went back to my room and dressed quickly, pulling clothes out of the closet without looking at them. When I returned, Da was sitting at the table, hands clasped around a mug of tea. I filled the kettle and put it back on the burner. My thoughts clattered and clanged inside