stopping today. We’re done.’
He looked calm but the clench in his jaw gave him away. He reached a hand out towards her. She scrambled backwards.
‘Don’t touch me!’ After everything they’d shared, she didn’t want to hurt him with her vehemence. Her chest sucked back into itself. ‘Please. If you touch me, I’ll cave. And I don’t want to cave. I’m asking you to respect the fact that I can’t do this any more.’
Her voice cracked on the final words. Damn.
His eyes clouded over and then he dropped them to look at her tightly clenched hands where she rested them on the mattress. Grief washed through her.
‘Rob...’
‘So, that’s it then. Game over.’
‘It had to come to an end sooner or later.’
‘Who says?’ She hadn’t seen him this angry since the day on the beach. It mobilised her. Anger was only going to open the door to things she’d rather not release.
‘I do, Rob. By all means carry on by yourself but it’s not going to be quite the same, is it?’ Her words were sarcastic and blunt but she had to make sure he understood.
It’s over.
He stood and pushed past her to exit the tent. His lithe golden body tormented her with its closeness. He snatched his shorts as he went.
Her heart pounded heavily in the silence and she sat for a moment, regrouping. If she stayed in the tent she could just let him go; he wouldn’t come back in. He was as good as his word. But she felt the hurt radiating from him and wanted to—needed to—explain further. She scrabbled out after him and then cannoned into steel as she met him coming straight back in, now partially clothed. His hands automatically snaked around her to stop her falling.
‘Do you understand that this doesn’t come along every day, Honor?’ He pulled her hard up against his body to reinforce their physical compatibility. Then he motioned back and forth between their foreheads ‘Or this?’
His voice took on a husky edge as he repeated the action from her heart to his and back again. ‘Or this. Is it so easy for you to just throw that away?’
She melted at the feel of his hot body against hers. Hotter than usual, given his extreme anger. ‘I don’t want this or this—’ she touched her head and then her heart, panic rising as he held her fast ‘—and without those it’s not fair of me to want you physically. It’s not right.’
‘But you do want me?’ He almost shook her and then thrust her away from him on a curse and turned his back. Tears sprang into her eyes.
‘Of course I want you. It’s been amazing. A gift.’ He bent to pull his shoes on and she watched the ripple of his powerful muscles. She knew, with certainty, that she’d never see his like again, much less have it for her own. She reached out to touch the middle of his back, tears threatening. She caught herself just in time. ‘But I can’t give you more than that. I don’t have anything left to give.’
He turned back to her and pulled her into his arms, crushing her head against his shoulder and tangling his hand in her hair. ‘Goddammit, Honor. If that’s all I can have, I’ll take it.’
His raw hurt tore through her. ‘You don’t mean that, Rob. You deserve so much more.’ She pushed away and moved out of his reach. The absence of his warmth left her chilled.
‘According to you, I deserve some party princess without a thought between her ears. Is that all you think I’m worthy of? Or is it a couple of quick rolls in the lagoon but nothing more?’
She looked at him in horror. ‘Rob, no.’
A pained snarl marred his face. ‘Help me understand, Honor. I’m trying to find the line in the sand. Because right now this is sounding disturbingly familiar. Never quite good enough. Never quite shiny enough. Sufficient for a good time but not for a lifetime—am I getting close?’
She reached towards him, desperate to ease the pain that flared uncontrolled in his face.
‘You don’t deserve me.’ Her voice was hoarse, knowing that she’d caused him all this pain. His beautiful energy and passion and verve didn’t need to be dragged down by a woman with a lifetime of baggage. He deserved so much more.
She didn’t see her mistake until his face drained of colour and his breath left him in a rush. ‘No, Honor, that’s become abundantly clear.’
‘Oh, Rob, no...’ She