been before. But I couldn’t completely forget that there was something different now, a new awareness in the way we held each other. Perhaps it was the realization that life was such a fragile thing. Though he moved with grace, I could feel a slight tension in him whenever his weight moved to his bad leg, and I knew it must be causing him pain to dance but that it would cause even more to stop.
And so we swayed gently to the music, a strange mixture of melancholy and contentment and something more buzzing through me. Major Ramsey and everything else that had happened tonight suddenly seemed very far away.
The recording came to an end, but we stayed where we were, our arms still around each other. I looked up at him and our eyes held for a long moment.
Then he released me and stepped back, his jaw tightening as his step faltered ever so slightly.
“I suppose I should go,” he said, mustering a smile. “At least now your lovely gown hasn’t gone to waste.”
“Stay a little longer.” Somehow, I was reluctant to be alone just now. “I’ve got a new Glenn Miller recording.” It had been something we had always loved doing together, listening to music late into the night.
He hesitated then nodded. “All right.”
He went back to the sofa as I moved to the gramophone. “You’ll like this one, I think.”
“Good old Ellie,” he said, pulling a cigarette case from his pocket. “Always making me feel right at home.”
I took my seat beside him and we sat finishing our tea and listening to the music, without the need to talk. Despite the strange way I’d felt in his arms, I was comfortable and at ease, felt better than I had in ages. I hadn’t really realized how much I had missed him, how much I had missed the company of someone with whom I felt I knew where I stood.
It wasn’t quite the same with Uncle Mick. He was always his cheery self even with the boys gone, but I knew that he was feeling the strain of Toby being missing and of Colm off fighting. It was hard on all of us, but some part of me always felt the need to protect my uncle, to not let him see how things affected me. I needed to be strong for him.
I had been so lost in the thought that I was surprised when the record came to an end. “Shall we listen to another?”
Felix didn’t answer. When I looked over at him, he was asleep.
I knew I should wake him. Uncle Mick had always been an understanding man, but he would never approve of a man staying overnight in my flat. Not even Felix; perhaps especially not Felix.
But I couldn’t bear to wake him up. It was cool outside, and he looked so very warm and comfortable there on the couch. Besides, I knew his leg must trouble him a great deal, and, if he could sleep well here, I didn’t intend to interrupt him.
And so I took a blanket that Nacy had knitted and gently draped it over him. He didn’t so much as stir.
I quietly turned out the light and went to my bedroom.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
Felix left early, before I was awake. It was a shame he left so soon, for I would have been happy to feed him breakfast. It would have created a scandal if he had been caught here, I supposed, but I didn’t really care. I was a grown woman, after all. Uncle Mick and Nacy might scold me, but what happened in my flat was my business.
Besides, even if I had been romantically inclined toward Felix, I knew better than to let things go too far with a man who had no serious intentions. And, despite the way he had looked at me last night, Felix’s intentions were never serious. At least, that’s what I had always thought. Felix was glib and charming, and, despite my attraction to him, I had not thought he meant much by his flirtations. But I had to admit that something was different between us now. It was something more substantial than the fleeting sparks of mutual attraction. We were moving into uncharted territory. It was an added complication to a steadily growing list of complications.
Whatever the case, the sofa was empty when I came out of the bedroom, the blanket I had covered him with neatly folded atop the cushions.
I went to the house for