Her flushed cheeks resembled an artist’s rendition of a cherub, her chest rose and fell in the natural rhythm of sleep. Tears welled in Erin’s eyes but she held them back.
“Are you okay?”
Erin started at the sound of the male voice and looked up to see Tony standing in the doorway. She placed a silencing finger against her lips and gestured him out of the room, pulling the door closed behind her.
“I’m fine,” she whispered. “Let’s talk someplace else. I don’t want to wake them.”
He clasped her hand, weaved through the small crowd of people in the kitchen and didn’t stop until they reached the steps on the back deck. He sat on the top step and pulled her down beside him.
“I can’t sit out here,” Erin protested. “I have to help Tess. There are still people in the house. Did you see the food? I’ve never seen so many casseroles in my life. We couldn’t possibly eat all that food. I have to help her pack it up and—”
“Tess is in her glory.” He cradled her against his side. “She’s doing what she does best and what makes her feel the most useful. She doesn’t need you in there right now.”
Erin contemplated his words. He was right. They were all coping with their grief in their own way. Tess needed to feel useful and to stay busy.
Tony tilted her chin and smiled into her eyes. “Besides, last time I looked, Patrick was wrapped in an apron and drying dishes. I don’t think we should ruin a beautiful thing.”
Erin returned the smile and nodded.
“You look exhausted.” Tony brushed a lock of hair from her forehead.
“I am exhausted. I don’t think I’ve had more than four hours of solid sleep at one time since Carol disappeared.” She gently eased away from him, not wanting to be comforted or to feel that all was right with the world when it wasn’t. Instead of taking offense, he seemed to understand and remained beside her in companionable silence.
“I can’t believe Carol’s parents didn’t come. What kind of people don’t come to their only daughter’s funeral?”
“The kind of parents who are scared to death they may be asked to care for their Down syndrome grandchild.” Erin couldn’t stop her teeth from clenching or keep anger from lacing her words.
“Have they ever met Amy?” Tony asked.
“No. They couldn’t understand her insistence to have a child without a man in her life. Her father is a minister of an ultraconservative church. He believes anything other than conceiving through marriage is a sin.”
Tony shook his head but refrained from comment.
“Did Carol know about Amy before she was born?”
“Yes. But she loved Amy from the very first ultrasound.” Erin swiped a tear off her cheek. “And once she actually held her…no one could pry that child away.”
Tony smiled. “I can understand why. She’s a beautiful little girl. And what a personality.”
Erin smiled. “I couldn’t agree more.”
“And the grandparents? They didn’t come around after Amy was born?”
“When Carol discovered she carried a Down syndrome baby, her parents took it as a sign God was punishing her. They disowned her. They haven’t spoken since.”
“Remind me not to visit their church. Seems the preacher missed the lessons the Bible teaches on forgiveness and compassion.”
Erin nodded.
“What happens to Amy now?”
“I adopt her.”
Tony raised an eyebrow. “Can you do that? I mean, legally?”
“After my father died, Carol and I became sensitive to our situations as single mothers and wanted to protect our children. We had a lawyer draw up guardian papers years ago. She’d raise Jack if anything happened to me and I’d raise Amy if…” Erin’s body shuddered. “It was a safety precaution like air bags in automobiles. You never expect them to go off, but you feel safer knowing they’re in place.”
Tony squeezed her hand.
“I’m having such a hard time believing Carol’s gone. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to accept it. We’ve been friends our entire lives. She helped me through my divorce. And I was there for her through her pregnancy. She helped me find my faith. How do you say goodbye to the other half of your heart?”
Erin silently stared at a dark cloud hugging the horizon and watched the sun begin to slip behind it. “Who was she dating, Tony?” She turned and looked him straight in the eyes. “I want to know. Who was the man that reported Carol missing?”
Tony clasped his hands together, holding them in front of him. “Erin, we’ve been over this