ttt
Matilda retired to her chamber, washed her face and hands, and changed her stout boots for soft indoor shoes. She was trapped here, she thought, and in this room which was Brian’s through and through and gave her neither respite nor tranquillity.
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Riding the horses had lifted her spirits for a short while, but knowing she could not just leave as she chose, knowing that her every move was being observed and judged, made her feel like a prisoner.
The lady Maude entered the room. Her dark gown was flecked with dog hairs as usual and she smelt faintly of the kennel. “Heralds from the Earl of Gloucester have arrived, domina,” she said. “He will be here by noontide.” A great wash of relief swept through Matilda and she felt as if a crushing weight had lifted from her chest. “Thank God, thank God! That is great news!” With Robert here, Wallingford would feel more like a court and she could begin the business of governing again in earnest. She needed to talk to him and find out what had happened in Normandy, and especially how much aid Geoffrey had sent, even though he had obviously not come himself. They could take stock and regroup; recover and evaluate.
Maude made a stiff curtsey. “If you will excuse me, domina.
The castle is going to be full at the seams and there is food and accommodation to prepare.”
Her voice was neutral, but Matilda sensed the resentment lurking in the impassive gaze. “Thank you,” she said quietly.
“I know this is a hardship for you.”
“It is my duty, domina.” Maude raised her head proudly. “I am lady of Wallingford, and have been since well before your father of blessed memory was a crowned king.”
“Nevertheless, you have my gratitude.” Maude curtseyed again, woodenly, as if Matilda had offered her an insult.
ttt
Matilda prepared for Robert’s arrival. She dressed in one of the gowns she had brought from Oxford, worn as an underlayer that snowy night. It was of red wool, the sleeves and neck 409
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trimmed with silk of the deep royal purple that was the hue of a western sky at midnight, and stitched with jewels. She wore her father’s sapphire ring and a large glossy ruby that matched the gown. She had brought her crown of gold flowers from Oxford, and she set this on her head, over her silk veil. The feel of the band across her brow reassured her, carrying as it did the pressure of regal authority.
An usher came to tell her that the Earl of Gloucester and his entourage had arrived and were dismounting in the outer bailey. Matilda smoothed the dress and, with mingled feelings of relief and apprehension, went to greet her brother.
There was no sign of Brian, who had gone out to meet the party and escort Robert to the hall in honour, but Maude was there, and she too had changed her dress for one of plain but clean blue wool. Jugs of wine had been set out on a table together with baskets of bread and pastries.
Robert entered the hall with his customary vigour, the manner of his stride emphasising his height and his strong body.
However, there were tired pouches beneath his eyes and far more grey in his hair than Matilda remembered. She hastened to embrace him, but stopped in her tracks as she saw the boy standing a little behind him and to one side like a squire. He was sturdy, with golden-red hair, freckles, and brilliant grey eyes. “Henry,” she whispered, close to disbelief. “Henry?”
“I have brought you a rare and precious Christmas gift,” Robert said, smiling.
“My lady mother,” Henry said and knelt to her.
Matilda stared and stared. She wanted to bend down and scoop up the little boy she had left behind, but in his stead was this older being, self-contained and already marked for manhood. It was as if she had put down a precious object and returning to it a while later had discovered it utterly changed.
All the emotion she had been suppressing as she battled to 410
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survive and keep hope alive now threatened to flood up and overwhelm her. Her chin wobbled and her mouth moved in different directions as she tried to control herself. She had a position to uphold, and knew she should not be acting like this in public, in front of her son. People were gazing at her in consternation.
“Mama, don’t cry,”