closed my lips again. The back halls through the castle were long and narrow, but Cresswell appeared to have taken the time to memorize the routes, leading us down a side hall and to a winding staircase until I recognized the wallpaper as a match for what we'd passed after the assassination attempt.
There was a hollow feeling in my stomach, and I realized I had no idea what time it was, how many hours had passed in my grandmother's suite since I'd been called there that morning. It wasn't until Cresswell opened the door into a private resting room in my suite and I caught the notes of feminine voices through another door, that I remembered what today had been.
My back bristled, that feral feeling of the Hunger rising, and I turned and pressed myself against Thao's chest, halting our movement. His arms wrapped around me, patient as I settled myself.
"What's wrong?" he asked.
"I forgot they'd be here." There was a nervous, soft laugh from the next room. Nora, I thought.
"We'll dismiss them," Thao said with a shrug.
I shook my head, pulling away slowly, my eyes drawn down to the floor, strangely shy of the men around me as I headed for the door. I wanted to tell them to wait there so I could deal with my new ladies-in-waiting alone. I was all frayed at the edges, my control unraveled in the wake of my grandmother's death, but I couldn't really leave all my Chosen sitting in a room that was meant for me to retreat in.
The voices died immediately as I stepped into the doorway of my dressing room, and I lifted my eyes to see Nora and Morgan straightening and stepping together, falling into low curtsies. They were already dressed in black, and it struck me that noble families must already have had their mourning garments ready once the news was released of my grandmother's illness.
At the heart of my dressing room was a long wide bench, Nora and Morgan standing on the far side of it, with a great black gown draped across its surface. For me.
"I'm sorry I wasn't here to receive you upon your arrival," I said, my voice sounding far away and echoey.
Nora and Morgan glanced at one another with wide eyes, Nora's pale hands wringing over her dark skirt.
"You don't need to worry about us, Your Highness," Morgan said, obviously taking pains to make her voice sound soft and demure. "We…we laid out a dress for you, but only if you—you don't have to, um…wear it."
I gaped blankly at the dress, none of my thoughts seeming to fire in the right direction. I'd been nervous for these two women to join my service, but now I was barely able to focus on them. On anything for that matter.
"Thank you, that was very thoughtful," Wendell said, joining me at my side, his long fingers sliding against mine and clasping. "You were shown your rooms?"
Morgan and Nora both murmured yes.
"Very good. I think that will be all for today," Wendell said.
My cheeks flushed, the heat of shame burning there, but I couldn't argue, my eyes fixed to the gown on the bench. It was so…ornate, which seemed wrong somehow, as if elegance should matter at the moment.
Fabric rustled as my ladies-in-waiting made a quiet escape, and Wendell's free hand not tangled with mine turned me around so I was facing my Chosen and not the black gown.
"What do I do?" I whispered, frowning.
"You've barely eaten today. You'll take a little supper and a long soak in the bath, and you'll let us read to you," Wendell said, soft and matter of fact.
"There's too much to—"
"Not today," he said more quickly.
My head turned, and Wendell caught my chin. "I don't want to wear that thing."
"It's hideous, where did they find it?" Thao asked and then went silent with a stern glance from Cosmo.
"Six weeks of mourning start tomorrow," Wendell said. "But tonight, you rest."
"Who am I mourning?" My Chosen all looked suddenly stricken, and I shook my head, my voice rising, growing tight. "I don't mean—I know, but I… When she…when she died, I thought to myself, 'But who will support me to the crown?' And stars, what kind of thing is that to think when—"
"Oh, Bryony," Cosmo gasped out, rushing forward and wrapping me up in tight arms. "Stop. It's all right."
"She's my grandmother, and all I could think was that I'd lost my best ally!" I cried out. My body was shaking in