that fear that made me run. I need you, and I feared to have lost your friendship. I could not bear the thought of having you look at me with regret and disappointment.
And so I left.
It was cowardly, I know. I ought to have stayed and faced your disappointment, given you the chance to yell at me after our disagreement. Can you forgive me? I pray that you can because I miss you. I miss you terribly. Life is no longer the same without you, and I hope that I have not lost you for good.
Please write to me, and if you so desire, I will return and let you yell at me for as long as you wish!
Your friend,
Nathanial
Sighing, Charlaine sat back, her gaze moving from the letter in her lap. “He didn’t write a word about Abigail,” she whispered to the empty room. “Not a word. What does that mean?”
As her mind ran rampant, her gaze once more dropped to the letter, following the lines he had written without thought. Indeed, Nathanial had not mentioned Abigail at all. He had not spoken of his love for his former fiancée or referenced their happy reunion in any way.
What he had written about was their encounter at the lake. Our disagreement, he had called it. He had spoken of friendship with ardent words, expressing without doubt how much she meant to him. Still, he had called her his friend.
Nothing more.
Was this the answer she had sought?
*
“Ah! There you are.”
Looking up from the papers upon the desk, Nathanial found Abigail poking her head around the door. “Is there anything I can do for you?”
Stepping inside, she approached him, a letter in her hand. “This came for you. I told Gusford I would deliver it to you without delay.” She grinned. “He is a rather serious man, is he not?”
Nathanial tensed, his eyes fixed on the letter. “I believe in these parts it is considered a requirement in a butler.” Pushing to his feet, he rounded the desk, his hand trembling ever so slightly as he reached for the envelope. Had Zach written to him? Or…?
Dimly, he noticed Abigail’s laughter cease as her eyes settled upon his face. “Are you all right? You look pale.”
Nathanial swallowed, then took the letter from her hand, turning it to read the words written on the front.
Instantly, his heart slammed against his ribcage: Charlaine!
Striding away to the window, Nathanial ripped open the envelope with jerky movements, impatience urging him on. The parchment almost slipped from his fingers in his haste to know what she had written.
Dearest Nathanial,
Always have we been frank with one another and so I will continue down that path and tell you with all honesty that your rushed departure from Markham Hall made me very angry. I walked around for days contemplating all manners of appropriate punishments for your callous behavior as you called it.
You hurt me because I, too, thought I had lost you when you left without a word. Don’t ever do that again, do you hear? As your friend, I will never turn from you simply because you snap at me. Yes, I will most likely snap back, but I will not leave you. How could you think I would?
I do wish you would come back, not to yell at you, but to see you again. I, too, miss you terribly. Still, I would not wish for you to return out of obligation, but because you, too, desire it. If life at Pembroke Hall keeps you busy, stay. See to your affairs, and if ever you feel like walking through the grass barefoot again, you’ll know where to find me.
Your friend always,
Charlaine
All air rushed from Nathanial’s lungs in relief as his eyes fell from the last word, his lids closing to cherish the words he had read. “I did not lose her,” he mumbled as an image of Charlaine rose in his mind. With arms crossed, she stood before him, brows raised in annoyance as she shook her head at him, chiding him for ever thinking she would abandon him. Had she not made him a promise?
“Who is she?”
At the sound of Abigail’s voice, Nathanial flinched, then slowly turned. He had all but forgotten her presence.
Her face looked tense as her gaze moved from the letter in his hands to meet his eyes. “Have you found a new love?” she asked, a slight quiver in her voice.
Yes! “No,” Nathanial replied, overwhelmed by the contradicting emotions tugging on his heart. “I