That’s exactly what I said.”
“Um, what do you mean by that?” Candice asks.
“I’m the woman who doesn’t have a problem with casual sex,” I admit. “The woman all guys say they want but believe doesn’t exist.”
They both gape at me silently.
“I’m serious. I had a guy call me that once, and he explained what he meant. And he’s right. I’m never really looking for a relationship when I hook up with a guy. If a man does interest me, it never seems to last for long. The spark is gone.” I snap my fingers for emphasis. “Just like that.”
They both shift in their seats, their eyes looking anywhere but at me.
Sighing loudly, I shake my head. “I’m guessing neither of you would describe yourself as a sexual unicorn.”
“Not particularly,” Candice says with a tiny grimace.
“Nope. My sexual experience was sadly lacking until I met Jared. I’ve had sex with three guys,” Sarah says, her cheeks becoming rosy. “Including Jared.”
“My number is three too!” Candice grabs hold of Sarah’s arm excitedly, like they’re part of some special club. “Including Charlie.”
My friends are making me feel like my number is waaaaay too big.
“Three? That’s it?” I ask weakly.
Now they’re both staring straight at me. “How many men have you been with?” Sarah asks.
I count them in my head. “Um…twelve?”
They give each other a surprised look, but then they school their expressions, and Sarah is the first one to speak. “I’m not about to slut shame you, Stella. There’s nothing wrong with having sex with twelve men.”
“Oh, I didn’t have actual sex with all of them. Some of them I just messed around with,” I say, and they both nod eagerly, their eyes as wide as saucers. I get the feeling they’d love to hear more details, but I don’t know if I’m willing to share.
I’m also wondering if I actually impressed them. Candice is younger than us and grew up quite sheltered, so I know she didn’t get much chance to experiment with guys. And Sarah lost both of her parents to a horrible car accident when she was barely out of high school. She had to take care of her younger siblings, which didn’t allow her much time to herself.
Me? I’m the rebellious rich girl who did her best to defy her parents, especially in my late teens and early twenties. No real expectations were put upon me growing up. They didn’t encourage me to go to college. They always assumed I’d grow up, marry some nice Italian boy, birth out a bunch of babies and keep working at Sweet Dreams. Maybe they’d let me manage it if they believed I was competent enough.
Managing the café doesn’t sound half bad, but is that really…it? All I’m going to do with my life is run one of the family businesses? Stay and live in the same place for the rest of my life?
My destiny has been set since I was a little girl.
I guess partying and messing around with guys was my chance to interrupt my destiny for a while. But then that bored me. I settled back in at Sweet Dreams, which made my family happy. I hung out with my friends. Went out with a guy here and there. Messed around here and there. Ended up having a one-night stand with Carter and…
After that night, my life narrowed down even more. Not that I can blame Carter. It’s not his fault I couldn’t imagine myself with any other man. That I’d rather hold onto the memory of that one night with Carter, versus trying to date someone else.
Hmm, or maybe that is Carter’s fault.
“I’m sure your…sexual encounter stories are fascinating,” Candice says, awe tingeing her voice.
“Please.” I wave a hand. I’ve barely told her anything. “They’re not that fascinating. Some were fun. Some were disappointments.”
“You’ve lived a more exciting life than I have.” She sends me a pointed look. “We’ve had similar backgrounds too, you know. Though I think I was far more sheltered than you growing up.”
I burst out laughing. “Trust me, I was sheltered. The good little Italian girl, the youngest, the one my parents overprotected. My brothers were my shadows throughout high school. I had to sneak out to have any real fun.”
“I didn’t get a chance to do anything because I had so much responsibility,” Sarah says, Candice and I nodding in shared sympathy.
Sarah is secretly my hero. I don’t know how she was able to deal with such a tragedy at such a young age.