bon viveur style of a man who had enjoyed the finer things in life and taken them to excess. He had been a very well-known and successful photographer until he’d drunk himself into an early grave. Jessica, Amelia’s mother, had also died relatively young, from cancer, a few years ago. Lizzie grimaced. Johnny could only have been about fourteen at the time and his siblings not much older. Their mother’s death must have devastated their lives and now they had lost Amelia too. She pushed the hair back from her face with hands that shook a little. What utter crap people had to deal with sometimes.
A buzzing on the entry phone disturbed her. She didn’t really want to see anyone this evening. She was bone tired and wanted to sleep.
‘Lizzie.’ It was Dudley’s voice. ‘Let me in.’
Lizzie’s heart leaped with a mixture of relief and anxiety. She’d kept trying to ring Dudley and had sent him a load of texts but he hadn’t replied to any of them. She jumped up, pressing the button to let him in and rushing across the flat to the door. She grabbed him as soon as he came in, wrapping her arms about him, holding him close. He felt warm and reassuring and smelled of his citrus cologne, and she almost cried at the familiarity of it.
‘Dudley,’ she said, muffled against his shirt. ‘Thank God. Oh, I’m so glad to see you.’ She hugged him tighter. ‘I’m so sorry, so very sorry about everything.’
It took her a moment to realise that Dudley wasn’t returning the hug. He stood limp within her grasp, and when she drew back to scan his face, he looked down at her with an expression she recognised from childhood. Lizzie’s heart sank. Dudley was sulking. Next would be the recriminations.
Dudley pulled away and strode across the room with restless energy to throw himself into one of the low armchairs by the window. His fair, open face was marred by a ferocious scowl.
‘What the fuck?’ he said, running a hand through the hair that flopped over his brow. ‘Where have you been when I needed you?’
‘That’s not fair.’ Lizzie felt awful, hot, guilty and miserable. ‘I’ve been working all day today. It’s not as though I didn’t get in touch. I tried ringing but you were always engaged or your phone was switched off. I texted you as soon as I could and I’ve lost count of the messages I’ve sent you since. I’ve been worried sick about you!’
Dudley stared at her, his dark eyes full of bafflement and anger. ‘Why didn’t you come to find me?’ he asked. ‘Oh wait – I totally get it. You’re cutting me loose like everyone else. I’m toxic now. My career’s over.’
‘What are you talking about?’ Lizzie stared at him. She’d expected Dudley to be devastated; she’d imagined that he must be experiencing a whole cocktail of complex emotions about Amelia’s death and the police investigation, but she hadn’t expected his prime concern to be his career.
‘Bill told my agent today that they’ve offered the cohost role on Musical World to Damon Wood,’ Dudley said. He sat forward, his gaze accusing. ‘I thought you and I were doing that show together?’
Lizzie spread her hands wide. ‘I don’t know anything about it.’ She shook her head. ‘I’m sorry, that was really insensitive of Bill to do that now—’
Dudley interrupted her. ‘Don’t give me that bullshit,’ he said. ‘Bill doesn’t breathe without your permission. Of course he would have told you.’
He stood up and strode across the room as though he couldn’t keep still. Lizzie could feel the air crackling with his anger and frustration. ‘Have you any idea how crap all this is for me?’ he burst out. ‘Dina practically forced me to withdraw from Stars of the Dance even though I didn’t see why I should. Now I’ve lost this show too, and another three jobs I thought were in the bag. Everything’s falling apart around me and you don’t give a shit.’
‘That’s not true,’ Lizzie said, trying to hold onto her temper. ‘Of course I care! But you know what this business is like, Dudley. It can be brutal. You just need to give everything time to settle down. It’s hardly surprising people are jittery. You’ve just lost your wife and there are a lot of rumours going around…’ She thought of Johnny and his vivid despair, and the contrast with Dudley and his self-pitying interviews online and in the news. She rubbed