chance, but I never did. I haven’t seen him since the night I left five years ago. The love of my life. My hero. My husband. I just disappeared one night, because I couldn’t handle it. I couldn’t take the demons he was hiding in his head. Demons I didn’t even know about—because he just shut down and wouldn’t tell me.
He fell out of love with me, because of those demons.
And my heart broke.
“Hey, are you okay?”
I look up to see Pippa, my housemate, standing at the door. Pippa was kind enough to take Immy and I in six months ago when I came back to town, to be with my mom when she fell ill with cancer. Mom’s is terminal, and I wanted to spend as much time as I could with her. The only way to do that was to move home, but she doesn’t have the space in her tiny house so I had to get a new job and find a place.
Pippa is a sweet girl, and is dating a member of a motorcycle club. She’s kind hearted, and a good friend. I’ve not had a great deal to do with the club, but they seem like great guys. I just try to stay out of it, especially after I found out Max, my husband, helped her in a recent situation she had with some bad people and the club.
Max still lives here, in the same town. He runs a club that has a massive underground fighting ring, called House Of Obsidian. The club has been in his family a while, but the fighting ring was something Max started.
I never thought he’d go down that path. Max was always going to be a football star, but when we fell in love and got married, things changed. I never wondered if he regretted his decision not to follow his dreams, because he seemed so happy with me.
Until everything changed.
“I’m okay.” I smile, stroking my daughter’s hair.
“Do you want me to fill her cup? Or get a towel? Something warm for her tummy?”
I love Pippa.
“We’re okay, Pippa.”
She comes into the room, and gently strokes Immy’s hair. Pippa is a beautiful soul, and a really pretty girl. With her pretty big eyes and light blond hair, she would seem like your typical beauty, but she’s not. She’s tiny, and fragile, and quiet most of the time. I don’t think she truly knows how beautiful she is.
“What did the doctor say today?”
“He said to keep her hydrated; there’s not much else we can do.”
Her eyes get soft. “It’s time likes these having help would be good.”
“You’re telling me.”
We both fall silent. She knows about Max, she knows what he means to me, and she’s not once pushed for me to go and see him, even though he asked her about me the night he saved her life. She didn’t tell him a lot, but he knows I’m here and he hasn’t once tried to find me. I guess that answers everything for me—he doesn’t want to see me.
Or maybe he’s as terrified as I am of reliving a past we’ve both obviously tried to bury.
“Do you want me to sit with her a few hours, while you get some rest?” Pippa offers.
“No.” I offer a weak curl of my lips. “But thanks. Maybe tomorrow?”
She nods. “Night. Yell out if you need anything.”
“Thanks, Pippa. Goodnight.”
When she goes, I lay down with Imogen and tuck her against me, wrapping my arms around her. My eyes are heavy and sore, and the moment I feel her breathing even out, I let them close on a sigh.
Yes, it’s hard sometimes, but she makes all of it worth the effort.
~*~*~*~
“How’s Immy?” Mom croaks, smiling at my daughter who is watching television at her house the next day.
I let my eyes scan over my daughter, who has some color in her cheeks today. Thank God. “After she fell asleep last night, she seemed to pick up. I’m so thankful; she was so unwell.”
Mom nods and looks over to me, still smiling. Her eyes are dull, no longer the vibrant green they once were. She lost all her hair when she underwent chemotherapy, so she’s wearing a beautiful silk scarf around her head. She’s still beautiful—she’ll always be beautiful—she just looks exhausted. The doctors have given her a few months, but they said she could go downhill at anytime.
That thought is terrifying. The very idea that each day with her could possibly be the last makes my