in his body tense. ‘Lydia?’
Evie almost shivered at the sudden drop in his tone. ‘She told me a little about you and Isaac growing up in the care system and what the house at Lavender Bay symbolises for you. She asked me not to give up on you. So, by the way, did Ethan.’
Finn wanted to roar at the interference. How dared they talk about him behind his back? This stuff was deeply, deeply personal! ‘Lydia and Ethan,’ he ground out, ‘should really learn to keep their big mouths shut.’
‘They care about you, Finn,’ she murmured. ‘As I do. And I’m willing to meet you at this halfway you wanted, to marry you, but only if you’re willing to meet me halfway. I want us to get to know each other, Finn. No holds barred. No topic off limits.’
Finn felt the slow burn of anger being doused by hope as the push and pull of emotions seesawed inside him.
He could have what he wanted.
But at what cost?
Was she hoping her amateur attempts at psychology would result in some breakthrough? ‘Do you think me spilling my guts to you will make me love you somehow? Is that what you’re hoping for, Evie? Because it’s probably just going to make me resent you.’
Goose-bumps broke out on Evie’s arms at the conviction in his voice. She shrugged. ‘Well, I guess that’s a risk I’m prepared to take. This isn’t about making you love me, Finn.’
‘Isn’t it? Isn’t it?’ he demanded, his emotions swinging again. ‘So when we get to the end of it all and you know all the sordid details of my life, especially the bit where I don’t know how to love anybody because I grew up without any and I still can’t give you the love you want, you’re still going to marry me? Is that right?’
Evie swallowed at the stark facts he hadn’t bothered to sugar-coat. ‘Yes. That’s right. I just want to know you better. Is it so wrong to want to know the man you’re married to? The father of your child?’
Finn hated that she was so bloody rational. They were talking about his life and there was nothing rational about that. He stood and glared down at her. ‘So you want to know how it felt to have Isaac die in my arms?’ he demanded. ‘And my awful childhood with a mother who abandoned us? You want to know all my dirty little secrets?’
Evie nodded, knowing it was vital to stay calm in the face of his consternation. She understood she was asking a very big thing of him. It was only fair for him to rail against it for a while.
‘Yes,’ she said quietly. ‘I don’t want you to tell me everything in one night. We can build up to the hard stuff but … yes, I want to know it all.’
Finn felt lost as the storm raged inside him. He’d thought she’d back down in the face of his outrage but she wasn’t even blinking. He felt angry and scared and panicked as he contemplated what she wanted.
Cornered.
And then Evie slipped her hand into his and it was like the storm suddenly calmed and he had an overwhelming urge to tell her everything. Completely unburden himself. ‘Sit down,’ she said. ‘Eat your curry. It’s getting cold.’
Finn sat, his heart beating like a bongo drum as he raked his hands through his hair. She picked up his plate and handed it to him and he took it, eating automatically as his thoughts whizzed around and collided with each other like atoms on speed.
‘What do you want to know?’ he asked eventually after half his meal had been demolished and he couldn’t stand the silence any longer.
‘It’s okay,’ Evie said. ‘We don’t have to talk tonight. Just … tell me about your day.’
He frowned. ‘My day?’
Evie gave a half-laugh at his bewildered expression. ‘Yes. Your day. You know, the stuff married people talk about all the time.’
It was awkward at first but they were soon chatting about safe hospital topics—his theatre list tomorrow, how Prince Khalid was going, some new whizz-bang monitor he wanted for the cath lab and the new salads on the canteen menu. And before Evie knew it, two hours had passed and Finn was on his second cup of coffee.
Even he looked surprised when he checked his watch as he drained the dregs from his mug. ‘I guess I’d better get going,’ he said, looking at her, curiously not wanting to leave.
Evie