moments, I would dream about living out on this ranch with him. Our lives would have been so simple, so organic. Slowing down, I stop my car as I stare out at his family land. This land has been in the Matthews family for generations.
Ultimately, my dreams were bigger than a simple, slow, organic lifestyle. I wanted the city. I wanted to try to make it big. I wanted to try everything. Ford wouldn’t have ever come with me, and even if he had, he would’ve hated every single second.
This is his peace. Not once did he ever express an interest in living anywhere but on this ranch. I had no choice but to run. As much as I hated hurting him and the way that I did it.
On that day, facing him there with all our family and friends, I knew that I would make us both miserable if I walked down that aisle.
Turning my car around, I leave the ranch and head back into town. My stomach rumbles and I decide to get to the grocery store and grab some food that is fresh and real. I can’t handle diner food or Lulamae’s judgmental gaze again, not today.
Heading toward HEB, I smile as soon as I turn into the parking lot. God, it’s been a lifetime since I’ve been inside of an HEB grocery store. Finding a spot, I pull in and stare at the entrance. Not a single thing has changed, absolutely nothing.
Keeping my glasses on, I climb out of the car and head inside. I’m dressed down today, wearing jeans and a t-shirt with flat sandals. I didn’t put any makeup on and my hair is in a braid down my back in hopes that I won’t be recognized.
Though, since Lulamae knew exactly who I was yesterday, my hopes are not too high on that front. Grabbing a handheld basket, I carry it against my side as I walk toward the fresh produce. I’m surprised at the size of the organic produce department, it’s triple the size that I imagined it would be.
Reaching for the Fredericksburg yellow peaches, I moan as I hold a peach up to my nose. It smells amazing. Smells like home. I shouldn’t buy any, there is way too much sugar in peaches, but I can’t stop myself from placing two in my basket.
“Amazing, right?” a woman’s voice says next to me.
Looking over, I smile at her. She’s got a young toddler sitting in the basket, her legs swinging as her hands curl around the handle and a young child sitting in the large part of the cart. The woman has long blonde hair that’s braided down her shoulder and though she looks tired, she also looks happy.
“I haven’t had one in years,” I admit.
She tilts her head to the side, her eyes searching my face. I expect to see recognition cross her features as she figures out who I am, but it doesn’t. She only smiles, then turns to the little boy.
“Reese, honey, can you grab a couple of those peaches for Daddy? He asked for peach jam this summer.”
I almost moan at the thought of peach jam, of Fredericksburg peach jam. She continues putting things in her basket near me, and I can’t help but watch her. She’s a few years younger than me, but she looks blissfully happy. So damn happy. I wonder if I could have been that happy had I stayed here?
“You okay?” she asks a few moments later.
Shaking my head, I give her a smile and shove my glasses up on my head. “Yeah, I’m sorry. You just look really happy. It’s sweet.”
She frowns, then smiles softly. “I am really happy.”
We make small talk for a few minutes and I find out that she’s been married a little over three years and that she’s lived here her whole life. I don’t recognize her name when she introduces herself as Channing, but since she’s a bit younger than me, I probably didn’t go to school with her.
“You know, this may sound weird, but a bunch of us decided to do a barbeque out by the lake tonight. You’re more than welcome to join us. We’re just going to grill and hang out, the more the merrier.”
Jesus, but I forgot what small-town life was like. I would never invite a perfect stranger anywhere near me in LA, even if I was going to be in public.
I think about telling her no, but then I remember that I have