and kissed me. That’s right, she fucking grabbed me and kissed me. So what did I do? I pulled her off of me in record time, but not before my. . .”
He stops and looks down.
“Sorry. Not before my girlfriend walked in at the worst possible moment and saw what was happening. She bolted because she thought I was cheating on her, even though I wasn’t. I would never do that. I stayed behind because I needed to get you-know-who out, and the only way that was happening was to physically move her—and I don’t believe in that sort of thing—or to have the cops take her away, so that’s what I did. I just told you the rest.”
Holy shit, is he telling the truth right now?
“But look, part of being an alpha—hell, part of being a man in general is knowing when to take responsibly for any part of a bad situation you’ve contributed to in any way. My mistake was letting her in my place. I had my reasons, but I won’t use them as excuses to make a weak ass apology. If I hadn’t done that, the kiss never would have happened, and I wouldn’t have lost the best woman I’ve ever had in my life. So that’s on me, and for that I’m very sorry. More sorry than you all know. I just had to get that off my chest.”
He looks emotional. I feel so terrible right now if that’s what really happened. Why didn’t I give him a chance to explain that to me? I shouldn’t be hearing it at VidCon in a room full of people.
“But you all didn’t come here to hear my sob stories, I just thought some of you might be able to take something from that story. But now what you’ve all been waiting for. . .”
I slip out the back just as he’s bringing up a host of silly products that are all related to a guy’s junk. I don’t need to hear that part. No one does, actually, but I’m not a hater. I need to get back to my fans. Sabina’s been texting me non-stop for the past five minutes telling me that a line is forming.
I have to talk to Conor, though. I do what I should have done weeks ago, but right now there’s something I really have to do first.
Shoshana
“Is her my perfect boyfriend? He just might be.”
This was all Sabina’s idea.
I can’t blame my assistant, though. This is my platform and I agreed to it, but it’s one of those ideas that sounds way better when you think about it a month ahead of time, but something you really don’t want to do when the moment comes.
I have to give it to her, though, it’s great move.
Her idea was to have a live episode of Boyfriend Designer, but to turn the camera on me so that the fans who came to see me could ask me some of the questions I always ask them. I agreed, and now I’m about to hit that ‘Live’ button and hand my phone over to Sabina. She arranged for a small room where my girls could grill me.
“Ready?” she asks.
“Just hit the button,” I joke. When she does, I start the show. “Welcome to a very very special edition of The Boyfriend Designer. Right now, I’m live at VidCon with thirty of my closest friends.” Sabina turns my phone towards the crowd and they all cheer and wave. “There they are now. And we’re going to do something a little different today. Today, it’s my turn to answer questions. So let’s get started.” Everyone raises their hands and I call on a girl at random. “Yes?”
“Okay, I have to start in the obvious place, sorry. But can you describe your perfect boyfriend, physically?”
“Of course, and thanks for the question. Ummm. . . well. . . I’ve always been a sucker for a tall guy. Height is so sexy. When I’m standing next to a tall guy, I feel so small and protected. I also love eyes—any color as long as they’re nice, but I do love me some light eyes.”
I call on the next girl. “And what about personality?”
“As far as personality goes, the guy needs to be sure of himself, because there’s nothing worse than an insecure guy. Those guys usually like to fight or do crazy stuff to try and prove who they are. The confident guys know who they are already. Umm. . .