breaths, I steadied myself—or tried to. Of its own volition, my shaking hand moved to the doorknob, turned. Spots whirled in front of my eyes; the excitement was almost too much. Exhaling, I flung open the door.
I sped toward my sisters as though I were being chased.
They showed no delight in seeing me, not until I guided them away from Harley and the boys to the private corner where Beth’s bed resided. Harl watched us pass but pretended not to: his back was too stiff, his laugh too loud to be natural. The girls didn’t spare him a second look. Frantically, I pulled the screens to; quickly, so quickly. When I thought we were out of his sight, I raised my pinafore and urged my sisters to drink. Then, finally, they were all smiles. Voracious and thirsty.
Stretched out on Beth’s quilt, I closed my eyes. Mister Pérouse rarely lifted my skirts higher than necessary; so unless they marred my neck or cleft, he wouldn’t see any marks they made. I bit my tongue when their fangs perforated my belly. Again and again, their heads bobbed as they sought the sweetest blood I had to offer. I directed them around the places I thought my daughter lay curled—soon a double band of dripping holes was scratched beneath my ribcage. Time slowed. I floated on their quiet slurping, the musk of unwashed skin and blankets. I didn’t have to force them off me; satiated, they stopped on their own. Looking at the mess of red pooled beneath me, soaked into mattress and clothes, I hoped they’d guzzled enough to remember.
For a moment, none of us spoke. Miah sniffed, went back for seconds. My heart sank. I couldn’t bear to look at her, or at Beth. Couldn’t see the forgetful glimmer in their eyes, the dew on their lips.
I’d done it for nothing. Risked everything for nothing.
“I’ve got to go.” I swallowed the lump in my throat, and gently pushed to dislodge Miah. Tried to muster sufficient energy to stand. “Dawn’s breaking: time for night creatures to go to sleep.”
Warm tears spilled over my cheeks as Beth wriggled up beside me until her head was parallel with mine. Flinging an arm across my chest, she squeezed and said, “Tell us a story before you go. The one Ma always told. You know, with the crazy bird in the gumdrop tree? The one who cried and cried instead of laughed and laughed?”
“Okay,” I said, though I could hardly speak for crying, hardly breathe for hugging. Beth’s eyes had gone from pink to blue. Focused. Clearer than I’d seen them in two and a half years. A giggle burst from my throat, and its echo came from Beth’s. Neither of us had heard that story since Miah was smaller than the baby inside me. My laughter died off as I looked at my youngest sister. When I began the tale, the pressure of her mouth at my waist increased. Nothing more.
“Once upon a time—”
“Qu’est ce que tu fait?”
Mister Pérouse’s voice whipped me upright. In a blur he was upon me. His fingernails pierced the soft flesh in my upper arm; yanking me from the bed, he knocked the girls to the floor like ragdolls. Neither of them cried out: already the memories were fading from Beth’s eyes. “It isn’t enough!” My face hot with tears. “I need more time.” But there was none to be had.
A fist slammed into my cheek. I stumbled, skinned my knees. He pulled me up, tearing my hair, my dress. Théo shook his head, pretended not to hear the commotion as he skittered up the far wall, taking refuge in a fourth-floor balcony. Arianne nodded at my master; with a lift of her eyebrow, beckoned him to visit her chamber after punishments had been meted. Few of Mister Pérouse’s young flunkies paid any attention, no matter how hard I sobbed, nor how loudly I begged as he dragged me down the hallway. Except, that is, for Harley. Shuffling from foot to foot, he loitered just outside the grande salle. Like a puppy waiting to be let in after he’d done his business.
Like a messenger just returned from an errand.
Harl averted his eyes as we screamed past. Back to Mister Pérouse’s apartments; back to thick musty draperies; back to stagnant air. I cried out and clawed at the wallpaper, at the doorframes, until my nails were split and bleeding. Harley followed, staring at his toes. My stomach churned with lava. Rage,