there was nothing I could do about any of that. I could only hope that I would see her again. I could believe that I would.
But I wouldn’t pray.
The gods had never answered my prayers before.
And it no longer felt right to ask them for anything when I…I could no longer deny what Vikter had claimed.
That I wanted to be found unworthy.
I sighed, concentrating on the sensation of the wind lifting the wisps of hair from around my forehead and temple.
The Duchess hadn’t come to say goodbye.
It didn’t surprise me. And it didn’t hurt like it had before. There wasn’t even disappointment, and I wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or a bad one.
“You look like you’re enjoying yourself.”
Opening my eyes at the sound of Hawke’s voice, I turned around and almost wished I’d kept my eyes closed.
Hawke wasn’t dressed like a guard as he stood next to a massive black horse. His dark brown breeches hugged his long legs, showcasing the strength of his body. His tunic was heavy and long-sleeved, suited for cold weather, as was the fur-lined cloak. In the sunlight, his hair was the color of a raven’s wings.
Somehow, he looked even more striking dressed as a commoner.
And he was staring at me, one eyebrow raised while I was…well, I was just gawking at him. My cheeks heated. “It feels nice.”
“For the air to touch your face?” he asked, figuring out what I was talking about.
I nodded.
“I can only imagine that it does.” His gaze flickered across my face. “I much prefer this version.”
Biting down on my lip, I reached out and lightly rubbed the side of the horse’s nose. “He’s beautiful. Does he have a name?”
“Been told it’s Setti.”
I smiled at that. “Named after Theon’s warhorse?” Setti nudged my hand for more pets. “He has big hooves to fill.”
“That he does,” Hawke replied. “I’m assuming you can’t ride a horse.”
I shook my head no. “I haven’t been on one since…” My smile widened. “Gods, it was three years ago. Tawny and I snuck out to the stables and managed to climb on one before Vikter arrived.” My smile faded as I dropped my hand and stepped back. “So, no, I can’t ride.”
“That will be intriguing.” He paused. “And torturous since you’ll be riding with me.”
My heart skipped over itself as I looked over at him. “And why is that intriguing? And torturous?”
One side of his lips curved up. The dimple appeared. “Besides the fact that it will allow me to keep a very close eye on you? Use your imagination, Princess.”
My imagination didn’t fail me then. “That’s inappropriate,” I told him.
“Is it?” He dipped his chin. “You’re not the Maiden out here. You’re Poppy, unveiled and unburdened.”
My gaze met his, and the surge of anticipation and relief proved that under the pain and anger, other emotions simmered. “And what of when I arrive at the capital? I will become the Maiden once more.”
“But that’s neither today nor tomorrow,” he said, turning back to one of the saddlebags on his horse. “I brought something for you.”
I waited, wondering what it could be since the only thing I’d been able to pack was underclothing and two additional sweater-tunics.
Opening one of the leather bags, he reached inside and pulled out something folded in a cloth. He unwrapped it as he turned to me.
My heart stopped and then sped up when I saw what he held in his hand, recognizing the ivory-hued handle and the reddish-black blade.
“My dagger.” My throat clogged. “I thought…I thought it was lost.”
“I found it later that night.” A sheathe lay under it. “I didn’t want to give it to you when I had to worry about you running off and using it, but you’ll need it for this trip.”
The fact that he was making sure I was equipped to defend myself in case it was needed meant the world to me. But the fact that he’d found the dagger and kept it safe for me…
“I don’t know what to say.” I cleared the hoarseness from my throat as he handed it over. The moment my fingers curled around the handle, I let out a shaky breath. “Vikter gave me this on my sixteenth birthday. It’s been my favorite.”
“It’s a beautiful weapon.”
The clog dissipated, and all I could do was nod as I carefully sheathed the dagger and then secured it to my right thigh. It took a moment for me to speak. “Thank you.”
Hawke didn’t respond. When I looked up, I saw