Ann felt like this surreal conversation was choking her.
Lucy sniffled. “I don’t see myself as a very good mother. I don’t know the first thing about babies.”
Katie Ann eased back into the rocking chair, feeling nauseous. All she’d ever wanted was a baby, and for her and Ivan to have a family together. Now his mistress was sitting on the couch crying. “Being a mother will come naturally to you.”
Lucy swiped at a tear. “Do you think? Did it come naturally to you?”
Katie Ann didn’t like being compared to Lucy, and she didn’t want to share such an intimate detail with her. “It came naturally. And it will for you too.”
Lucy lowered her head again. “I just don’t know what I’m going to do. I took an advance from work to be able to make this trip.” She stared up at Katie Ann. “Do you think Ivan bought this house for us? To surprise me?”
Katie Ann studied the woman’s expression. “I don’t know.”
“It’s the only thing that makes sense.” She put a finger to her lips for a moment, then asked, “You haven’t gotten any mail regarding this, have you?”
Katie Ann recalled a letter she received from Ivan’s attorney awhile back, but there was no mention of any house. “No. I haven’t.”
Lucy started crying again.
“Can I get you something to drink?”
“Maybe just a glass of water.” Lucy pulled a tissue from her coat pocket and blew her nose.
Katie Ann left her in the living room and returned a moment later. She handed the glass of water to her, then folded her arms across her chest. “How much do you need?”
Lucy swallowed a gulp of water. “What?”
“How much money do you need to keep your house from going into foreclosure?”
Lucy stood up and faced Katie Ann. “I didn’t come here to ask you for money. I just came here to see if you recognized that house, or knew where it might be located.”
Katie Ann gazed into Lucy’s eyes, and for some reason . . . she believed her. She left the room, and a minute later she returned with her checkbook.
“Katie Ann, I will not take any money from you.”
Katie Ann scribbled out what she thought would be enough to carry Lucy for several months. She tore the check out and handed it to Lucy. “Take it. You are going to give birth to Jonas’s brother or sister.”
Lucy stiffened her arms at her sides and shook her head. “I can’t.” Then she covered her face with her hands. “How could you even make this offer, after what I did to you?”
Tears poured down Lucy’s face, and Katie Ann dabbed at her own eyes.
“I’m the most horrible person on the planet, and if I could go back, I would have never, never . . .” She sobbed harder. “Please forgive me, Katie Ann.” She looked up at her. “Please. I need to be forgiven.”
Katie Ann swallowed back a lump in her throat. She knew that she could ease Lucy’s pain by telling her that she was forgiven, but the words just wouldn’t come. The image of Ivan walking out the door, abandoning their life together, kept flashing before her.
She pushed the check toward Lucy. “Take the money, Lucy. If not for you, for the child.”
Lucy slowly reached for the check. “Ivan should have stayed with you. You’re a much better person than I am.”
Katie Ann wanted to say, “Yes, he should have.” Instead she moved toward the door, hoping Lucy would follow.
She did.
Lucy stepped out on the porch and then peered at Katie Ann through the screen, tears still streaming down her cheeks. “I loved him. And I miss him very much.”
Katie Ann took a deep breath, rubbed her forehead, and thought about how much she missed Ivan too.
“Ivan and I had a fight the night he was killed.” Lucy closed her eyes tightly for a moment before she looked back at Katie Ann. “We said ugly things to each other, then he left.” She locked eyes with Katie Ann and tipped her head to one side. “I always wondered if he was going back to you.”
A tear rolled down Katie Ann’s cheek, and with Lucy’s eyes still locked with hers, she closed the door. Katie Ann knew that she would spend the rest of her life wondering too now.
MARTHA SAT DOWN in her recliner, bumping the small table next to her chair for the thousandth time. Katie Ann asked her why she didn’t move the table over, but once she was