I demanded, reeling from Ian’s recklessness. No one talked to my father that way. It was akin to slapping Death in the face, and Death always slapped back.
Ian spared me the briefest glance. “No, because I’m not talking to the god of the netherworld now. I’m talking to your father, and if he can’t handle hearing criticism about what he’s done while in that role, then he shouldn’t have done it.”
Where was that lake of acid when I needed it? Dissolving into nothingness sounded like a vacation right now.
“If anyone gets to bitch at him for being a bad father, it’s me, not you,” I said through gritted teeth. “Though what do you mean about me being trapped in Phanes’s realm?”
Ian gave me a brief, pitying look. “Phanes’s realm is normally impenetrable to everyone except him and whoever he brings in with him. Part of his security system. I couldn’t use your blood to summon you from it, and on my own power, I couldn’t teleport into it to get you. Neither could Ashael, and he’s a demigod, like you are. So, when your dear ol’ da promised you to Phanes, he knew you’d be trapped in his world the moment he brought you there.”
I pushed Ian aside. This time, he let me. Then, I got in my father’s face, so hurt and angry that I didn’t care about the consequences. When he freed Ian’s soul from Dagon months ago, I’d thought my father had cared for me, in his own cold, strange way. Clearly, I’d been wrong.
“You not only set me up to be married to Phanes without my consent, but you also set me up to be trapped by him? Why?”
He said nothing. A sharp laugh escaped me.
“I’d ask what I did to deserve this, but I hadn’t even been born yet when this was arranged. Did you even have a reason, beyond bestowing a ‘gift’ on Phanes for defeating those other gods—which, by the way, he lied about! So, if you only meant me to be his Good Behavior trophy, the joke’s on you, because Phanes just used me to free those same gods from your prison.”
“Making you just as liable for that theft from the dead that you said needed repaying,” Ian drawled.
My father gave him the same look he’d given people right before he ripped their souls out. “I would kill you for your hubris, but then she would only beseech me to raise you again, so I will spare myself the effort.”
“Don’t you dare hurt him,” I muttered.
“Dare?”
I’d never heard my father laugh before. After the sound, I never wanted to hear it again. Even Ian winced. Thousands of condemned souls shrieking at once would have been more soothing.
“‘Dare’ is the least of what happens when a god loves,” my father said in a frightening tone. “You are only starting to realize that. Your control is gone when it comes to him, is it not? As is your reason and sense of proportionality, because everything shatters under the weight of your love.”
I’d never heard him speak this way. I hadn’t thought he was capable of understanding raw emotion, let alone feeling it in the way his words implied. I nodded, too stunned to speak.
His voice darkened. “Love is the worst of curses for our kind. That is why I sought to protect you from it. I knew you could never love someone such as Phanes, so I promised you to him to spare you the pain our kind feels when we lose someone we love. Phanes also cannot be killed, so with him, you would never be alone, and once inside his realm, none of the gods who seek to use your power for themselves could reach you. Phanes was not meant to be your trap, daughter. He was meant to be your shelter.”
Emotions knotted me up inside. My father’s arrogance in arranging my life before I was even born enraged me, yet at the same time, I was touched that he’d cared enough to bother. Was this what it was like to be on the receiving end of a clusterfuck that started out with good intentions? If so, no wonder Ian was so often furious at me.
“Yes, well, despite your intentions, terrible things often happen when we make up other people’s minds for them while trying to protect them,” Ian said as if reading my thoughts.
I winced. Yes, I finally get it! Trying to control the ones you love will only backfire!
My father