now!”
I eyed the pamphlet, scanning it for anything like don’t go outside or you’ll burst into flames.
“I’m really sick. I have a massive headache. A fever. I’m vomiting and everything.”
“I don’t care. I need you. Seriously, Drew. You need to be here. I wouldn’t normally ask this of you, but we can’t lose this account.”
I let out a huff of air. I wondered what human resources would say if I called and said I was turned into a vampire. “Fine. I’ll see what I can do.”
“Great! Please hurry.” Lacey hung up the phone, and I bit the inside of my cheek before eyeing the pamphlet once more.
You’ll be very hungry. It will take time and practice to acclimate to your body’s new needs.
No shit, Sherlock. I kept scanning.
Always wear sunblock when outdoors. The sun is uncomfortable for vampires but not deadly.
Hella uncomfortable. Check. Check.
Avoid large crowds for the first six months.
Yeah. I lived in a big city. That wasn’t happening.
Avoid hospitals, blood banks, and other places where you are likely to encounter blood.
Easy enough.
I had the willpower of a saint. I once said no to a slice of chocolate Oreo cake at an office birthday because I was trying Keto. I could handle a little hunger pang. But if I was going to show up at work, I needed clothes. I had no desire to do a bloody walk of shame in my dress from last night.
Maybe I could find something in the lost and found? This was a club after all. And considering the number of naked couples I saw downstairs, there was likely to be a pile of forgotten garments somewhere. I walked over to the door and opened it, then screamed when I saw the largest man I’d ever seen in my adult life standing on the other side. He didn’t seem startled by my outburst.
“Lady Drew. Is there anything I can help you with? King Diego is meeting with the council and gave strict instructions that no one bothers him.”
Perfect. King of the undead was busy. I quickly assessed this man. Considering he was posted outside my door, I made the snap judgment that he was my guard. “I need clothes. And can you order me a cab? Have it here in, like, thirty minutes.”
The large man with bright blue eyes, pale skin, and a buzz cut eyed me warily. He had a jawline that most women would lose their shit over. And I had to tilt my head all the way up to see him. “King Diego left clothes for you in the bathroom, and you aren’t supposed to go anywhere without him.”
I squinted. “Did he say that explicitly, or was that sort of assumed?” I asked. He scowled.
“The king didn’t say those exact words, but it’s common knowledge that new vampires need to be assessed before going in public.”
“But he didn’t give you an order, right?” I asked. I’d read enough royal smut to know that there were loopholes to every rule. Bodice rippers were my jam.
“That would be correct, Lady Drew.”
I smiled at him. “And as a Lady, would that make my rank higher or lower than yours?”
The beefy man tensed as if I’d slapped him across the cheek. Clearing his throat, he forced words out through his thin lips. “Your rank supersedes mine, Lady Drew.”
“Perfect. I have about thirty minutes to get to work and convince a well-known sex toy line that our company is the right distributor for their new alien cocks. So I’m going to need you to order a car and have it here in fifteen minutes, uh, what was your name again?”
“Rocky, Lady Drew.”
“Rocky?” I asked, surprised. “How original.”
Rocky looked about two seconds from curling his fists and hitting me in the jaw. I wondered if I had super strength.
“So it’s settled?” I asked.
“Yes.”
“Great. Thank you, Rocky.” I gave him my award-winning customer service smile, then disappeared back in the room to see whatever god-awful clothes Diego had picked out for me. If there was a velvet cape involved, I was going to smother him with a pillow. I was only playing nice with Diego because I needed to understand what the fuck I was.
Drew
I made it to the office about thirty seconds before Lacey had a complete meltdown. The cab ride over was unpleasant, but thanks to my oversized sunglasses and caked on sunblock, it was bearable. I caught myself eyeing the driver’s neck a few times and wondering if his blood tasted as sweet as Diego’s.