I never even realized it.
Honestly? I tended to keep him at arm’s length. Just like I do with everyone else in my life, with the exception of the friends I’ve made in the last year, thanks to Caroline. Who knew that moment she spotted me in the bar at Tuscany restaurant after I got stood up by my date and invited me to have dinner with her friends would change my life forever?
Change it for the better.
They’re the only ones who know the closest version to the real me. And even then, they don’t see everything. Because I don’t let them. Being vulnerable isn’t smart. My mother hammered that home way too many times to count. She had a wall up throughout her entire life—and so do I.
Don’t get too close, the tiny voice in my head whispers. They might find out your secrets.
What’s scary? Theo has the potential to bust all my walls down. Every single one of them. And I bet he doesn’t even realize it.
He currently says nothing, and neither am I. I wait in breathless agony as those fingers smooth back down to my knee. He’s a tease.
I like it.
Without hesitation, he reaches for me. I go to him. His arm snakes around my waist and pulls me in closer. I rest my hands on his hot, hard chest, my gaze locking on the spot where his collar lies open. I want to press my mouth right there, on his bare, warm skin. I want to feel his pulse throb beneath my lips. I want to hear him groan. I want to feel his hands in my hair.
I have no idea what’s come over me, but when I lift my gaze to his, I see the same deep need reflected in his eyes. He’s thinking the same thing. He wants the same thing.
I want him. He wants me.
What’s stopping us?
Logic, the word whispers through my brain.
Friendship.
Both of those words should make me hesitate, but I don’t.
Curling my fingers into his shirt, I pull him in closer, his face hovering above mine, his lips right—there. I zero all my focus in on his mouth. His full lower lip. It’s sexy.
I’m tempted to bite it.
Our breathing accelerates and his head dips. His mouth grazes mine. It’s a question.
Do you want this? Should we do this?
Leaning in, I press my mouth to his in answer.
Yes. Yes.
Can he feel my internal begging? Because I am. Begging, that is. I can sense his hesitation, and I wonder if it’s that moral high ground he so carefully cultivates. He wants the public to see a certain version of him, just like I do. The man has been in denial for months. He’s not in pain. He doesn’t care if his fiancée cheated on him with a blood relative. No big deal, right?
It’s a huge deal to Theo. He hurts. He bleeds. He’s mortal. Throwing himself into his career to forget all that pain is only half his story.
I want to know the rest of the story. I want to discover the rest of the man.
His lips are soft, and the moment they touch mine with true purpose, tingles sweep over my skin, making me shiver. Even as I long for more, I also know this probably shouldn’t happen, I think as he kisses me again. His big hand slides up my back, until his fingers are in my hair, tugging on the ends. A moan escapes me at that first pinch of delicious pain, and he does it again.
I decide to provoke him by sinking my teeth into his plump lower lip. Not too hard at first. Just enough to sting.
He growls and deepens the kiss, his tongue sliding into my mouth. I circle my tongue around his eagerly, a sigh escaping me when he retreats, his kiss chaste once more.
Fuck chaste. I want more.
Climbing on top of him comes naturally. I straddle his lean hips. Wrap my arms around his neck. Thrust my fingers into the thick, soft hair at his nape so I can tug his head back and kiss him like I mean it. He kisses me back like he means it too. As if he’s always meant it and has restrained himself for far too long.
I can feel all that restraint pulsating at the surface, and I want him to unleash it all over me.
Hands start to wander and I press my chest into his palms whenever I can. Still no words are spoken. It’s probably better we