the accident, she kept her job in cosmetics. She had a discount at the department store, wore her own makeup like a pro, dressed beautifully in casual chic clothes, even taught her granddaughters how to apply their makeup so they wouldn’t look cheap or inexperienced. Beth had never cared that much but Lauren had always made good use of her makeup lessons, as did Lacey.
Lauren remembered having rich fantasies about how her life would be different from Honey’s when she was grown up. She would have an easier life and there would be luxuries now and then. And travel. And good clothes and a cleaning lady and a nice car.
She laughed softly. “And didn’t I just manage to get all that. And how exactly was it better?”
Dressed in jeans and a comfy chambray shirt, she opened the bedroom door. There sat Cassidy alone on the couch, texting or writing emails on her phone.
“I thought it was pretty quiet,” Lauren said. “My other daughter and her flowers are gone?”
Cassie put her phone aside. “Yes, but she didn’t go quietly. I made her cry.”
“Oh Cassie, why?”
“Because she’s selfish and spoiled and never thinks of anyone but herself.”
Lauren sighed. “That’s pretty normal in a young woman her age. She’ll grow out of it. Hopefully.”
“I don’t care whether she does or not,” Cassie said. “I decided a long time ago that I was just too unforgiving and everyone else in my family had more tolerance for Daddy than I did, but now what I realize is we all let this happen, let him build up momentum until he went too far. I’m done with him.”
Lauren was saddened by the fact that that made her feel good. She hadn’t planned to throw him under the bus to his daughters, even if he deserved it. “So, you’re not feeling forgiving?”
“Oh, maybe I’ll forgive him eventually, if he asks. But that doesn’t mean I’ll be spending time with him. Wouldn’t you say he’s crossed the line now? He’s a selfish and dangerous bastard. Don’t you dare go near him. I’m just terrified to leave you here alone.”
“I’ll be okay now. I outed him. I have friends and family here.”
“I’m terrified you’ll cave-in and go back to him!”
“Oh no, Cassie, no. I have my lawyer working on a restraining order. In fact, she said I’d have it today.”
“That’s a relief. For a nickel I’d kidnap you and take you back to Boston where I can watch over you and be sure Daddy hasn’t somehow manipulated you into thinking you can’t leave him!”
Lauren attempted a smile, but she was sure it was hideous. “And here I was worried that you were too timid to practice law.”
“I’m not timid, I’m quiet. You should watch the quiet ones,” she said.
“Yeah, so I’ve heard,” she said, thinking of Beau. “And how are things in Boston? Now that you’re sharing your flat.”
“You know one of the main reasons I love Jeremy?” Cassie asked earnestly. “He’s nothing like Daddy. He’s a good man who would never disrespect me. He would never lay a hand on another human being except to defend himself. He doesn’t even verbally spar with me. He’s honest, brilliant, tender and strong. I will have children with him, Mama. And he will be the best father in the world.”
Lauren nearly grabbed that cut lip in her teeth as she finished Cassie’s description in her head. They won’t have to listen to their father belittle and yell at their mother. Our children won’t see their father trip their mother, then lie about it. “Cassie, I’m so sorry,” she said softly. “I know there were times...”
“Stop,” she said, placing a hand on Lauren’s arm. “Lacey was right. Don’t tell her I said that, okay? But she’s right, a lot of our friends are from divorced homes and some of them have really shitty family situations. I managed to weed through and find some stable people to hang with, Jeremy being one. I knew you were putting up with more than you should. But honestly? I thought you’d put up with that forever.” She got tears in her eyes. “I wish he’d gotten better. I so wish he’d gotten better.”
But Lauren asked herself, Could I have loved him if he’d gotten better? I could have stayed, but could I have ever loved him again? Because abuse kills love. And the real tragedy was—that wasn’t always the case. Some women, bruised and bloody and fearing for their children’s lives, will say, But I love him.