Vicious Circles - By Leann Andrews Page 0,65
Baby, wake up. Wake up baby, I’m here. I’m calling someone.” I was rambling and digging for my phone in my pocket at the same time.
When the operator answered, 911 what’s your emergency, I explained what was going on and gave her the address. She put me on hold and that’s when I lost it. I cried. The tears fell from my eyes and onto my girlfriend’s blood stained cheek. They ran down her pale skin and on to the bloodied floor.
She was someone else. She was someone I didn’t know at all. I cradled her to my chest as I sobbed and choked. The smell was unbearable. Her clothes were soaked red and her hair was fanned out behind her where at some point she’d gotten sick. I ran my hand over her chest lightly, thanking the man upstairs that her heart was beating.
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” I wiped blood away from her eyes with my thumb.
The sounds of sirens appeared faintly in the distance and I was relieved that someone was coming to help her. It felt like hours as the ambulance and fire truck sped up the road and into the drive. When the EMT’s entered the house, I yelled for them until they found me in the kitchen on my knees, rocking Fallyn back and forth.
A tall, thin man politely pushed me away and I obliged. I stood against the wall, trembling for so many different reasons.
“What happened?” The man asked.
“I…I don’t know for sure. I know she’s taken some pills and some cocaine but that’s all. I just found her like this.”
“Is there anyone else in the house?” A woman in a police uniform appeared at my right with a notepad in her hand.
I nodded. “There’s…there’s a girl in the upstairs bathroom. She’s dead.”
The woman nodded and said something over the radio on her shoulder. They left me alone and all I could do was watch as Fallyn’s clothes were cut off and attempts were made to bring her around. She moaned softly but I didn’t celebrate. I dreaded the phone calls I would have to make when all I wanted to do was be with her.
A coroner arrived just as Fallyn was loaded into the back of the ambulance. I climbed into the back and held her hand the entire ride to the hospital. When we reached the emergency room, I had to let her go. The nurse on duty gave me a private room to wait in and some really bad coffee. Her smile was one of pity and I wondered how long it would take the vultures to publish our business in the same magazines Fallyn used to read.
I had called Lynn and the guys from the back of the ambulance. Lynn was on her way and I was sort of relieved that I didn’t have to shoulder the whole thing by myself. I could feel myself unraveling and it wouldn’t be pretty when I came completely undone.
More than five different police officers and detectives had filtered in and out of the room. They asked me questions and I answered the best that I could. Just when I thought I might have gotten a moment to myself, the nurse opened the door, startling me, and Lynn walked through with tears in her eyes. She took one look at me and broke into sobs.
“She’ll be fine. They said she’ll be fine.”
“Mason, what the hell happened? I should have gone back.” She wiped her face and sat, shocked, in one of the upholstered chairs. “Look at you.”
I looked down at my clothes. They were soaked in Fallyn’s blood and vomit. I didn’t smell so hot, but those things meant nothing to me. “This isn’t your fault Lynn.”
“I’m sorry you had to go through that.” She turned to me and placed her hand on my arm.
“Mason look at me.”
I turned my face toward her, all the while biting my bottom lip to prevent myself from breaking down.
“We can get through this, you know that right?”
Lynn meant well, and I was so happy she’d shown up, but I couldn’t bring myself to believe her.
“This…this is just too much right now.” My resolve began to crumble. “I can’t look at her and not feel guilty for all the shit I’ve put her through. I can’t, with a clear conscious, go to her and tell her everything will be OK. I should have been protecting her all along.”
“No, you’re wrong. This isn’t anyone’s fault.”
“Just stop.” I held