thinking about Sophia’s words for days. About how falling in love didn’t necessarily mean losing herself. And she thought about what Josie had said in the hospital: If you’re with someone for their whole life, things are gonna get hard. They’re gonna get hard in ways you can’t even imagine. The only chance you have of making it work is by opening up your mouth and saying what you’re feeling.
Maybe she didn’t know what would happen if she talked to Everett, but she knew one thing: she didn’t want to end things without telling him how she felt.
Teddy said goodbye to Carlos and ran to her car in the parking lot behind the shop, fat raindrops pelting her on the head. She got into her car, shook herself off, and started to text Everett, wincing when she saw that her last text to him had been from dinner at her mom’s house.
But then she realized that texts weren’t really their medium, anyway. She opened her email and started typing.
66
Half an hour later, Teddy stood at the back door of the station, hunched under the awning but still somehow getting wet. She texted Everett, Where are you? Please say you’re at the station.
About two seconds later, he pushed open the heavy door to let her in.
“If you came here to yell at me for coming to your place of business and punching your ex-boyfriend, that’s fair. Not my finest hour, and I apologize,” Everett said as the door swung shut behind them.
“No, I . . . Can we talk?” Teddy asked.
Everett’s eyes widened and he nodded. Teddy heard a squeaking noise coming down the hallway as a man pushing a bucket came into view.
“Hey, Tom,” Everett said with a wave.
Tom said, “Weird date spot,” then kept on moving.
“Sorry,” Everett said, leading her toward the set and taking her wet coat. He gestured toward the sofa as he flicked on a light. “Would you like to have a seat?”
Only the light directly above the sofa was on, making Teddy feel like she was part of a bizarre play, but she took a seat, anyway. She wished her hair wasn’t soaking wet and plastered to her head. When Everett sat down across from her, the shock of his nearness was almost too much to handle, but she made herself form words.
“This isn’t about earlier tonight. Although, yes, I would prefer you didn’t punch people in the face, but Richard . . . well, Richard may have deserved it.”
“I’m glad we agree on that,” Everett said.
Teddy took a deep breath. “Have you checked your email?”
Everett stared at her for a moment, then said, “Actually, I’m trying a new thing where I spend my evenings not thinking about work, so . . . no. I know I’m at work, which may contradict what I said, but I was planning on asking Tom if he wanted to go get a drink when he was done. Why? Did you send me something?”
“Yes.” Teddy nodded quickly.
“I was joking,” Everett said, grabbing his phone. “Did you really email me and then drive here to make sure I got the email?”
“That’s exactly what I did,” Teddy said. “I sent you an email, but I decided I couldn’t wait to see you, so . . . can you read it?”
“Right now?” Everett asked, finger poised over his phone screen. “While you watch me?”
Teddy nodded again.
Everett bit back a smile. “Right. Okay. This is kinda weird, but I like it.”
Teddy watched him read, although of course she knew what she’d written.
Dear Everett,
You once told me that nothing I ever said could come out wrong, and while it means a lot to me that you said so, I don’t really believe that. Sometimes it seems that all my words come out wrong, like they’re getting jumbled in the time it takes them to get from my brain to my mouth. But this? Well, we met through email, and that’s how we got to know each other, and I think I might be able to actually say what I mean here.
I told you we shouldn’t be together because I didn’t want to move and I didn’t want you to give up on your dream. And that’s all still true—I want to live here, in the same city as my friends and my family (who I’m starting to be a little bit more honest with, actually), and I certainly don’t want you to ever stop doing the show.
But I forgot about something pretty important. I’m