spending every moment together—as best friends and more. We were lovers in every sense but that. Intimate in every way.”
“I remember,” he said. He remembered those heady days all too well.
“You were so romantic, so attentive, you made my head spin. I thought you loved me.” Her voice cracked as the tears spilled over, and Rhy, wracked with guilt, stepped toward her. She stopped him with an upraised hand and a ferocious glare. “I know you never said it, but I thought ‘Oh, Rhyian, he’s just not expressive that way. It’s the Tala nature.’ I made all the excuses for you, so you didn’t have to. No, don’t say anything yet.”
Her fury had returned, building as she finally said everything she hadn’t before. Rhy sat, burying his face in his hands, telling himself he’d asked to hear this. That he deserved having his heart cracked open and fed to the fire.
“You showed me love, Rhyian,” she continued, the words burning. “In countless small ways. I thought I didn’t need the words, but that maybe you did. So I told you that night. Do you remember that night?”
It was seared into his memory. Lifting his head, he made himself meet her fulminous gaze, the sense of a distant storm gathering. Lightning about to strike. She had her hands clenched into fists. “I will never forget that night,” he said, more or less evenly. “It meant something to me, too.” He took a deep breath and made himself give her the truth. “Because I was in love with you.”
~ 8 ~
Lena stared at him, beyond infuriated that he could say those words—the ones she’d ached to hear and convinced herself she never would—and that he could say them now, in the past tense, with such cool remove. The emotions of the past blended with those of the present, and she wanted to simultaneously weep and rage. Worst of all, she hadn’t learned. Some foolish, self-destructive part of her hoped—actually hoped—that Rhyian might love her still.
Rhyian could always do that to her, lure her in with his sensual teasing and flattering attention. When he looked at her, she felt like the most beautiful woman in the world. The intensity of his regard had always turned her head, sweeping everything else away until she lost all of her good sense and only wanted. Well, you can’t want Rhyian, she told herself firmly. She’d had him before, and she’d paid the price. He was like a dragon, so beautiful and enticing with his jeweled scales, that seductive dark magic in him shimmering, luring her to warm herself in the heat of his unwavering regard—until some little thing annoyed him and he turned her to ash with a cruel remark that breathed fire.
“How can you say that to me?” she demanded, but it came out as a broken plea. “I don’t want or need your lies.”
He stood, raking a hand through his hair again, more agitated than she’d ever seen him. Starting to reach for her, he jammed his hands into his pockets instead. “I’m not lying.”
“Then why did you—” She’d thought it would do her good to say the words, to make them both relive that terrible morning. How she’d awakened in his bed full of bliss, transcendent with happiness. Rhyian had been gone, but she’d lingered, happily anticipating his return with the Nahanaun coffee she loved and pastries they could feed each other in bed. It was the first time they’d spent the night together—and the first time they’d made love all the way—but they’d stayed up until dawn plenty of times, cuddling and sharing those intimate breakfasts.
And after a while, her joy had chilled as his spot on the bed cooled, an ice of dread forming on the edges. Even then, she’d known, though she’d denied it. Just as she’d denied everything she understood about Rhyian and didn’t want to. When she dressed and went to find him, she’d tried to hope she was wrong.
“Why did I go from your arms to someone else’s?” he asked, the words bitter, his shoulders rigid.
“Yes.” She wiped the tears from her cheeks, amazed that she could still cry over it, over him. “You wanted me to find you.”
He met her gaze, his eyes deep blue with turbulent emotion, his face ravaged. “Yes.”
And there it was, the admission she’d craved and dreaded. “Why?”
He took a deep breath. “I don’t know.”
She gaped at him, cleansing rage rushing in to displace the old, festering hurt. Launching herself at him,