if there was to be any hope for them, he had to understand that she wanted rid of it from her life altogether. She was not going to go from the proverbial frying pan into the fire.
“You have to understand,” she continued “that if this thing between us is going to happen, it has to represent something new; something beautiful and pure. I’ve seen enough violence and experienced enough violence to last me a lifetime and I can’t put myself into another situation where scores are settled using fists. I refuse to do it.” She knew that she was making everything black and white with her attitude but she could not afford for there to be any misunderstandings. It would hurt enough now but weeks and months down the road, violence as a regular feature would break her completely and she knew without a doubt that she would not be strong enough to rebuild again.
This time when Vaughn looked across at her she saw the regret in his eyes and he lowered them momentarily, almost in shame, before turning back to the road.
“I understand, Elise, and I’m sorry.” He took a deep breath. “I saw that man with his hands on you and my heart stopped. I thought he was going to hurt you. I thought that I was going to lose you. I thought......it doesn’t matter. I know that we’ve only just met but last night...” he paused, “...last night meant so much to me, more than you can ever begin to understand. This has to happen, and I am terrified of it being taken away. I know I said I would settle for one night, for whatever part of you I could have, but I was only ever fooling myself. I can’t let you go now – I won’t let you go and I won’t apologise for that.”
Elise watched as a single tear rolled down his cheek, his eyes glued to the road, and she was reminded of him sobbing on her shoulder a short while earlier. The depth of his emotion was intense and she was smart enough to realise that she wasn’t the full story. For someone to experience such highs and lows there had to be more to it and she knew that he was holding out on her. Something had happened for those emotions to be out there, especially for a man and whilst she didn’t doubt the sincerity of his words, she began to wonder if she was merely the trigger to a much bigger issue. She sighed at the irony of ending up with this unforgiving attraction to a man who, in his own way, appeared to be just as bruised and battered as she was.
Accepting that there really wasn’t much more for either of them to say on the subject for the moment, she let the silence extend a while and then decided to change the focus, and ask him about something else that had been bothering her.
“Vaughn, when we were at the hotel...well, I was wondering why I had a different room to everyone else?” She asked and he looked across at her in surprise, clearly perplexed at her abrupt change of subject.
“What do you mean?”
“Well, I saw the room that the girls and guys’ shared and mine was so different – like yours. I thought it was a bit strange, that was all.”
“I don’t know,” he replied somewhat unconvincingly, “We were an odd number and perhaps they had to split us up – maybe that was the only accommodation they had available.” He shrugged, a little too innocently, and she noted that his eyes never once strayed from the road as if he was afraid to look at her.
She let it ride for a moment and then carried on.
“Don’t you think it’s strange though? I mean I can understand you having a better room but Tilly is way more senior than me; I would have thought Mr Andrews Snr would have given her the upgrade.” She smiled and watched as a slightly panicked expression crossed his face when he realised that she wasn’t going to give this one up.
“I don’t know Elise...honestly I don’t.” He replied, but the little tic in his jaw was a dead giveaway. He was lying and he knew that she knew that he was lying. She debated dropping a few more hints and slowly reeling him in but in the end she decided to just go for broke and ask him outright.
“Vaughn, why did