But it’s not just him, this whole place makes me uneasy. There’s danger everywhere and I feel exposed – it isn’t a safe environment for Mia. Thousands of people coming and going, packed together but oblivious to each other amid the hurry and the rush and the noise. There is a reason why train stations are a favourite target for terrorists.
Not here.
Don’t trust anyone.
Kathryn trusted me. She chose me.
If I have even a shadow of a doubt, even a flicker, I should trust that instinct to protect the baby. I have to make that decision for her.
I feel the weight of it, having to be responsible for others again.
I scan the station one more time for any other police officers, but see none.
Behind me, the shouting kicks up a notch.
Get away from them, all of them. Put distance between them and you, between them and Mia.
There has to be a smarter, safer way of doing this. I should find somewhere quieter and more controlled. I switch Mia to my other arm and she stares at me, on the edge of tears now, her little body rigid with alarm at the shouting and the noise.
‘We’re nearly there, Mia,’ I say. ‘Not long now until you’re back with your mum.’
But first I need to put some space between me and the strange man who’s followed us off the train, whether it’s me or the baby in my arms that he’s following. It’ll only take a minute to break contact, but I need a helping hand. I approach a stocky fortyish man in a yellow high-vis tabard with ‘Station Security’ printed on the back, while he’s encouraging a homeless man to move away from the cash machines.
‘Excuse me?’ I say.
The security guard turns, his broad face impassive. ‘How can I help?’
‘I’m really sorry to bother you but a man’s followed me off the train and he’s been taking pictures of my baby.’ I turn and point at the thin man. ‘He’s making me really uncomfortable and I just want him to leave us alone.’
‘That gentleman?’ He points a thick finger, his face darkening into a frown. ‘In the black jacket?’
‘That’s him.’
‘Are you both OK?’
‘I think so,’ I give Mia’s hand a protective pat. ‘Just a bit freaked out.’
‘Wait here, madam, I’ll have a word with him.’
He turns and approaches him with his palms up in calming gesture, speaking quietly.
I register the look of surprise on the thin man’s face, but I don’t wait to see what happens next. I turn away, smile down at Mia and walk towards the big archways that lead out of the station onto Melcombe Place, where the mid-afternoon sun is fighting its way through thinning clouds. I want to lose myself in the bustle of passengers coming and going, to get away from everyone who could be a threat.
I’ll do the right thing for Mia, but first we have to go somewhere safe; in the meantime I’ll take care of her for just a little while longer.
I walk quickly out of the station and head for the taxi rank without looking back.
5
Melcombe Place is busy with afternoon traffic and there’s a short queue at the taxi rank. I join the line, heart thrumming in my chest, keeping my eyes on the station exit in case the thin man emerges before I can get into a cab. There’s no sign so far but I know there is a side entrance too – he might go that way instead. Mia squirms a little and I jig her gently in my arm, the muscles already starting to ache from carrying her.
The taxi queue moves with painful slowness, a line of black cabs rolling slowly forward, engines rumbling as passengers get in and then pull away towards the junction with Great Central Street.
Come on, come on.
I’m queuing behind a white-haired couple in their seventies who I recognise from the train, the man in a jacket and tie and his wife in a dress and good shoes, dressed for a London day out, maybe a show. The woman turns around and sees me for the first time, her face softening at the sight of Mia.
‘Oh, she is gorgeous.’ She squeezes Mia’s pink-shoed foot. ‘Aren’t you?’
Mia gives her a wide-eyed smile.
‘Come on Mike, let this lady go first.’
‘What?’ her husband says. ‘Oh. Yes, of course.’
He stands aside and gestures for me to go ahead of them.
‘Thank you,’ I say.
A cab pulls up and the white-haired man opens the door for us, allowing me to