brain tried to make sense of it, the sudden change, but all she could think of were the roly-poly bugs behind the stones in her backyard when she’d been little. The way they’d balled up at her touch. His lips peeled in a grimace as his head jerked back to his spine.
She’d already brought her hand down, almost brushing against him, and the hand hovered there, frozen. Her lips tingled. Touch.
“Oh God,” she murmured, terror springing tears to her eyes. “Gabe!” Her throat ripped out the name, cracking and choking her off mid-scream.
The door burst open and Gabe fell down next to them.
“What’s going on?” Gabe asked, pulling at Az’s arm. Az was shivering now, his skin slick and gray. “Eden?”
“Touch. I passed him Touch.” She heard a thumping that she thought was her heart before she realized it was the rest of them running to the threshold.
“But…” Gabe grew quiet. “Oh!” he whispered, his mouth a surprised oval. He looked down to Az, then back at her. “Oh.”
Az’s head rolled on his shoulders. “It burns,” he said weakly.
“I’m sorry.” She would have cried if there’d been time to think about it.
“Why would you do this?” he whispered before he lolled forward again.
“Get him up,” she said, uncoiling one of his arms, yanking his deadweight. “We’ve got to get him downstairs. He has to spread it.”
Gabe looked sick. “He can’t.”
“What are you talking about?” She strained, trying to lift Az’s shoulders.
“He’s not a Sider, Eden. He can’t spread it.”
Misery coiled inside her, mirroring his body. What have I done? Az shuddered, his breath coming in sharp, shallow gasps.
“This is just the start, Eden.” Gabe crouched next to her. “He’s constantly fighting the need to complete his Fall. Battling his darkest thoughts.” He closed his eyes, lowering his voice. “You know what Touch does.”
Az’s eyes fluttered open.
They weren’t blue anymore. Or the angry red they’d been minutes ago in the bedroom. She could see the vessels, the cord of his optic nerve, the muscles concaving around the back of the orb. He blinked and they flashed obsidian black.
CHAPTER 44
She grabbed Az’s hand. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to.” Her face crumbled.
He tried to whisper, the words too low to make out. She leaned closer. “You said you hate me. It was all for nothing. Nothing worth staying for.”
“No, Az. Please…”
“Eden, leave.” Gabe pulled her shoulder. “Go!” he yelled. On the bed, Az quaked.
She broke into a sob, his fingers slipping out of hers as she staggered back toward the door.
“Az, look at me.” Gabe grabbed his jaw, forced him to make contact, though he couldn’t calm him down unless Az was open to it, allowed it. Az blinked hard and stared into Gabe’s eyes.
Eden turned, closed the door behind her. She ground her tears away with her palm before she made her way to the kitchen. Jarrod sat at the table by himself.
“He okay?” Jarrod asked.
She shook her head, blinking hard.
“Should be about ten hours until we’re out of the woods, right?”
“It’s not the same as it is with the mortals. He’s fighting against Falling.” Her voice broke. She looked around, stepping closer to where Jarrod sat. “Where are Adam and Libby?”
Jarrod was suddenly very interested in the can he was holding. “Adam left right after…”
Eden closed her eyes. He knew what she’d done. They all did.
“Did he say anything?” she asked. Jarrod wouldn’t look at her.
“Nothing you want to hear.”
She flicked her tongue across her lips, rapping her knuckles against the tabletop as she tried to fight a breakdown. “Nothing I don’t deserve.”
Jarrod glanced up for a second before he went back to the can.
“And Libby?” Eden asked quietly.
“She left a few minutes ago. Didn’t say anything. Think she needed air.”
She covered her mouth in an attempt to stifle the sob and leaped up, grabbing her coat. She couldn’t be there when the door opened again. Couldn’t see him that way, broken because she’d given in, wanted to love him again.
Jarrod called her name, but she was already halfway down the second flight of stairs. By the time she’d hit the security door, her phone was going off. She ignored his call, thumbing it to silent.
She stopped short on the stairs. Not a single Sider in sight. There haven’t been any in days, she realized. What if Luke was right? The Bound knew about them, were taking out the Siders a few at a time. Libby had just left.
Adam.
She had to find them.
Her feet numbed as an hour passed,