Temptation on Ocean Drive - Jennifer Probst Page 0,107
look at us.”
“I did. Gabe was your perfect match, and I think you screwed it up. I’ve been watching you guys for a while and trying to respect your space, but I can’t let my sister lose the best thing that’s happened to her. God, now I sound all dramatic and crap, like Avery. See what you’re making me do?”
She rolled her eyes at her sister’s words. “Oh, so you’re coming to my rescue? A few relevant insights, and I’ll change my mind and our relationship will be repaired, huh?”
“Hopefully. First up, what initiated the breakup?”
She was tempted to tell her to go away and keep her mess locked up tight, but Taylor seemed to genuinely care, and suddenly the invitation to share her heartache shook through her. A shaky breath escaped her lips. “I screwed up, T.”
“It’s okay, babe. Tell me.”
She did. She went over the stuff with Devon, the PTO, what Zoe had heard about Gabe, how she’d intercepted the call from Endless Vows, and what he’d told her outside the bar. When she was finished, she felt a bit lighter inside and had to remind herself it was important for her to lean on the people she loved.
“I see where Gabe is coming from,” Taylor said slowly. “But I’m more interested in you. Do you love him?”
For so long, she’d avoided the question even from herself. But now she just spoke from her heart. “Yes. He fills me up, T. It’s so much more than sex, though that’s beyond perfection. It’s the way he listens to me and makes me feel good about myself. How he treats Zoe and seems to want to be part of our family. It all snuck up on me, and when he confessed his real feelings, I finally experienced all these emotions I thought I’d shut down after Matt. But I kept having so many doubts. I was sure he was going to leave and take that job, and now I’ve made the biggest mistake of my life.”
“Why was it so easy to believe everyone else except Gabe?”
Startled, she stared at her sister. “I don’t know, it all seemed to fit.”
Taylor nodded thoughtfully. “It’s interesting, you seem to make choices based on everyone else’s opinions. I remember you told me once you worried about being judged if you went out too much because you were a single mom.”
“That could have happened!”
“Yep. But does it really matter, if that would make you happy? I think you stopped asking what you wanted, because you always worry about everybody else. Aren’t you tired of trying to please everyone except yourself?”
The memory of her conversation with Gabe during their car trip slammed through her. He’d asked if she was happy in Cape May and at Sunshine Bridal. Instead of answering yes, she’d given him all the excuses of why she was stuck.
“But maybe instead of feeling trapped in a life, you should choose to make it what you want.”
Is that what she’d been doing? Making choices based on other people’s opinions? “I’m so confused,” she murmured.
“What are you really afraid of, Bella?”
She buried her face in her hands. “Not being enough for him. What if I gave him everything I had, along with my daughter, and he gets bored or interested in someone else, and we’re left behind?”
“Or what if he dies like Matt did?”
She flinched, staring at her sister with betrayal. “How can you say something like that?” she hissed, anger shaking through her. “Why do you have to be so cruel?”
“I’m not. I’m just stating the facts. Matt was the love of your life, and he was killed. No one will ever know what type of pain you went through—it’s something you can only experience and get to the other side to really understand. You’re full of excuses about Gabe’s reputation and how you’re desperate to protect your daughter in case he leaves for bigger and better things. But I think it’s time you admit, at least to yourself, you’re really afraid Gabe can be taken away at any time and you won’t be able to handle it again.”
Shock barreled through her. Hot denials rose to her lips, then died. She took her sister’s words and flipped them over in her mind, pulling their meaning and how she felt about the accusation apart.
Then realized Taylor was right.
Losing Matt had almost broken her. Zoe was the fragile thread that kept her sane and pushing forward. The idea of going through that type of pain if