after school. You know that has never ever happened, right?”
“That’s not true,” the older woman said. “She used to come in here all the time when she was little and sit in that back corner booth and just watch you work.”
“She did?”
She nodded. “You were in high school at that time, and I swear that girl worshipped the ground you walked on.”
I laughed. “Now I know you’re making stuff up. It felt like a small break through with her though, so I’ll take it.”
“Just maybe you can get her to help out around here. You should not have to do it all yourself. You gave up college and everything for them. It’s not right.”
“Now you sound like Michelle.”
“Well, she is a wise woman.”
I frowned. “I’ll get back around to finishing my degree someday.”
“There’s always going to be a someday, but trust me, someday rarely ever comes unless you make it a priority.”
I contemplated that as I settled into my daily routine, chatted with customers, and took and served order after order.
The day passed quickly. The shifts changed, and then suddenly there was Sage. She looked a little uncertain as she took the booth in the back in corner. It reminded me of what Candace had said, but for the life of me I couldn’t remember the scene she had painted.
While away at college I had seen a therapist for a while after Sonnet’s disappearance. There were several holes in my memories. She said that was normal post trauma and Sonnet’s disappearance had been traumatic for me. But more than that she thought I held onto only the good memories of my past and the holes were my mind’s way of purging the negativity of my youth.
It made sense, but Candace didn’t describe a bad thing that needed purging. It was a memory I longed for. So why couldn’t I remember it?
The dinner crowd hadn’t begun yet, so I grabbed a couple of sodas and went to join Sage. She had her schoolbooks strewn out across the table.
I set the glasses down and then sat across from her.
“Thanks,” she said almost shyly.
“How was school?”
“It was school.”
I smiled. “Enough said. So, what are you working on here?”
“I have a big math test coming up and I already told you that I’m struggling.”
“Let me see what you’re working on.”
For the next hour I tutored my sister. After that the dinner crowd started filing in and I had to get back to work. To my surprise Sage stayed and continued working. Every now and then she would flag me down to ask a question.
By the time the dinner rush ended she seemed to have things down and was feeling more confident about her upcoming test or at least that’s what she told me.
“I miss this sometimes, you know?” she told me.
“What?”
“Hanging out in here with you. You helping me with my homework. All of it.”
I couldn’t confess that I really didn’t remember that life the way she seemed to. So instead, I simply asked, “Why don’t you do it more often then?”
She scrunched up her face. “Mom hates me hanging out here. She says I’m just getting in your way and I should leave you alone. There was a time I didn’t listen, but then you went away to college and I was so angry with you for leaving us. And then Sonnet was gone too. You came back but you weren’t the same. I don’t really know how to explain it.”
I nodded sadly. I was obsessed with finding our sister, but I had no idea it had affected anyone else but me.
I reached over and hugged her. “I’m here now and I’m not going anywhere.”
“Someday you will.”
I shook my head. “That’s not going to happen.”
“Promise?”
“I promise.”
“I miss her you know.”
“Who?”
“Sonnet.”
“Me too, little one. Me too.”
“Mom gets angry if I even mention her name and she took all her pictures down and boxed them up.”
“I think she’s just too sad to deal with it.”
“But she gave up on her. We all did. No one’s looking for her, Susan. Doesn’t that bother you?”
I sighed and lowered my voice. “I’m still looking.”
Her eyes widened. “But how? You’re always here working. When do you even have time for that?”
“You can’t tell anyone, Sage. Especially not Mom.”
I wasn’t sure I could trust her with this. I had tried to confide in Sapphire and all it did was hurt her more when I hit a dead end. I could see Sage was already hurting though.
“I won’t. I swear it,