strange, almost deranged look on his face. “Where’ve you been? Everything okay?” she asked.
He ran his hand over his face, transforming it back to normal, or normal with a hint of anxiety. “Yeah. Beck went to pick up Merrick.”
“I heard the helicopter leave and Rachael told me he was on his way back.”
MJ turned and ambled to a hammock. He fell back into it and closed his eyes, gripping the sides and she caught the flash of the diamond on his pinkie. “My ring,” she said, darting forward to retrieve it.
MJ fisted his hand. “You know what you have to do to get it back.”
“Why are you wearing it?”
“Because—”
Rachael, Heidi and the kids traipsed into the cloister, and MJ stopped talking.
“You two coming in?” Heidi asked. “You won’t want to get stuck in this storm.”
“In a minute,” Maddie said, eager to get rid of them. This was her chance to get her ring back.
“Where’s Dad?” Sam asked.
“He was taking a walk,” Heidi said, leading them out onto the path. “He’s probably at the hotel already.”
Maddie waited for them to get out of earshot. “You’re wearing it because…”
He smirked. “Because I can. It’s mine until you give me what I want.”
She pushed him, sending the hammock swinging. “Why are you doing this to me?”
MJ grabbed her hand and pulled her off her feet. She landed on the hammock half on top of him, half beside him. “I’m not doing anything to you,” he said, brushing her hair out of her face. “You’re the one who doesn’t know what she wants. I know what I want.”
He cupped her face and traced his thumb over her bottom lip sending tingles through her body. She touched the tip of his thumb with her tongue, and he pushed it farther into her mouth. Maddie closed her lips around it and closed her eyes. The small, intimate act sent her heart and body reeling.
MJ pulled his thumb from her mouth and she opened her eyes to stare into his. She never knew what she’d find in their depths. They always held a concoction of emotions and if she examined them long enough she could piece them together.
The regret was there, as it had been since she came back. And lust. The lust was easy to spot in MJ’s eyes. She thought she saw a flicker of hope, and it made guilt and sadness flare inside her chest.
There was no hope, MJ. He had to know that.
He brushed her cheek with the back of his hand. “Why can’t you tell me, Mads?”
The corners of her mouth twitched down and she couldn’t fake a smile or stop the frown from forming. A ball of emotion clogged her throat, and her nose burned with unshed tears. “It’ll hurt you even more. How can I tell you?”
“Don’t be afraid of hurting me. I’ve already hit bottom without you.” He smoothed the creases in her brow with his thumbs.
How could she even think about devastating him while lying here, watching his long, thick lashes brush the top of his cheeks when he blinked, running her fingers through the dark waves at the nape of his neck? She’d give anything for a smile right then, to see those incredible dimples, and the flash of laughter in his eyes.
But there was nothing to laugh about. There were only two parts of one very broken relationship lying in a hammock, one attempting to pick up the pieces and glue them together, and the other holding the knowledge that they could never be whole again.
Thunder echoed. The palm frond roof shook. “We should go in,” she said, bracing her hands on his shoulders to get up.
MJ pulled her back down. “Not yet.”
She held his eyes again and saw determination. She’d missed it before. “What do you want from me?” she asked.
“I want it all, Mads. I want my life back. You took it away, and I’m taking it back.” He balled her hair up behind her head and pulled her to him. His kiss wasn’t gentle. It wasn’t urgent or rough. It was possessive. Undaunted.
If she hadn’t known before, she knew now—MJ wasn’t giving her up without a fight.
She broke away from the kiss, breathless and confused. The past year and a half flashed before her eyes. She’d forced herself to move on, but why hadn’t he? “MJ, have you been with anyone else since?”
“Since?” He lifted his brows. He wanted to hear her say it.
“Since I left?”
He squeezed her hair tighter, making her lift