guess.
“Everything is good with them?” Adjusting to life in the States had to be a struggle.
“They’re doing well.”
“The kids are adjusting?”
“Yes.”
I bit down on my back molars with enough force to destroy my expensive dental work. “That’s all you have to tell me?”
“What more do you want to know?”
“I asked about the children, thinking that would be a safe enough subject, seeing how closed-mouthed you are about Ibrahim and Shatha.”
Mark took time pouring himself another glass of milk. He did it with such care one would think he was filling a prescription. “From what Ibrahim said, Amin and Sasha are both quickly picking up English.”
“It’s easier for children,” I murmured and dropped the subject, waiting to see if Mark would tell me anything more.
He didn’t.
I sat for several minutes stirring my food around my plate, but my appetite was gone. Shoving my dish aside, I stood. “I’ll be in my office.”
Mark glanced up with a look of surprise. “Okay.”
I carried my plate over to the sink and held on to the edge of it, certain now that Mark had made his decision and it was what I feared most. He would return to Iraq on another dangerous and desperate mission. For just a moment I thought I might be sick.
“Where’s Emily?” Mark asked, all at once interested in making casual conversation.
“She’s checking out a couple of apartments.” By the grace of the Almighty I was able to keep the pain out of my voice.
“She’s moving?”
By rote I rinsed off my plate and tucked it inside the dishwasher. “Yes. If you remember, I mentioned that this morning.”
“So you did. When is she moving?”
“When she finds an apartment.” By now and out of necessity, my responses were clipped. I didn’t possess the wherewithal to exchange chitchat with Mark.
I went into my office and pointedly closed the door. My intention had been to catch up on paperwork, something I’d delayed while caring for Mark. It soon became apparent my head wasn’t where it needed to be. After only a few minutes, I slumped my shoulders and buried my face in my hands, unable to think.
Mark was going to do it.
He was going to leave me again.
He hadn’t told me yet, but it was coming. I felt it in every pore of my body. Despite everything I’d said, despite knowing he was basically giving Greg the green light, he intended to return.
I didn’t realize I was shaking until I reached for a pen and was unable to hold on to it. What little dinner I’d managed to eat was revolting in my stomach.
Rover seemed to sense my anguish, because he stood and placed his chin on my thigh. Absently, I stroked his fur as I battled with the hurt and disappointment. The cell rang and I saw that it was Greg. Talking to him would be too much, so I let the call go to voice mail.
It took several minutes for my nerves to settle. I heard Mark in the kitchen. The faucet ran and then I heard the door to the dishwasher open. I really did need to get that creaking noise looked at. As much as possible, I ignored Mark.
Reaching for my phone, I sent Dana a text message, promising her I’d be at spin class the following afternoon. I might as well become involved in life again. In a few days, as soon as he was strong enough, possibly a week or two, Mark would be gone. I’d put it off too long, made him the center of my world instead of going after my own interests. No more.
With my phone in my hand I pushed the button that would replay Greg’s voice mail.
“Hi, Jo Marie. Just checking in to see how your day is going. I’m just leaving the office now and heading home. I’ve got a smoking-hot date with a frozen entrée and a rerun of NCIS New Orleans.”
I smiled and turned to see Mark framed in the doorway.
“I see he still calls.”
“I haven’t answered the last few times. Just let them go to voice mail.”
“You should tell him not to call again.”
I shrugged. “I probably should.” I hadn’t felt right about it from the first and I needed to put an end to it. I loved Mark. Greg was wonderful, but what I felt for him was a dim reflection of how much I loved Mark.
He looked surprised and turned away.
“Mark,” I said, stopping him. “I’m going back to my regular schedule. I’ve got my spin class and