and continued typing out the scrolling note.
My parents couldn’t afford the doctors and therapist, but they did the best they could. They taught me how to read lips. They used pictures and showed me how the mouth and tongue moved to pronounce the words. It’s not perfect, and I miss words that aren’t shaped by the way the mouth moves, but we practiced. A lot. My dad died when I was six and then it was just the three of us. It was hard but Mom kept teaching me on her own. She just wanted people to treat me like everyone else.
He glanced over to Gabriel, wondering if he had lost interest along the way. Instead, he was met with warm brown eyes waiting for his next words to appear on the screen, so he continued typing.
When Mom died, we had no other family. They had a tough time placing us together in a foster home, so my sister and I got split up. We lost touch with each other. I was placed with a few families, but it never lasted long. Most times, I felt like I was in this bubble, all alone. I went to a hearing school. I remember being the only deaf student at my middle and high schools. They could all hear, so they just assumed I could too. By that time, I was pretty good at reading lips, but it was still tough. I fell behind in class. I couldn’t follow the lectures when the teachers turned their backs to write on the board. I tried making friends. One on one worked sometimes but when people got together in groups, it was too tough trying to read everyone’s lips. And asking them to repeat themselves over and over got old really fast. I tried to fit in, but…
He shook his head, shoving away the school memories. A hand to his forearm stopped him. He glanced up at Gabriel, reading his lips as he spoke.
“But it was really hard,” Gabriel said, saying the words he hadn’t written.
Ben nodded. Growing up, I didn’t know anyone else who was deaf. I didn’t even know there was a Deaf community until my senior year in high school. I just…
He stopped typing. His hands were trembling. He exhaled a shaky breath and continued.
Around middle school, I started learning sign language. It was a little tough to learn while moving from one foster home to another, but I read books at the library and watched videos online.
He glanced up at Gabriel and gave him a small smile when those brown eyes met him, encouraging him to continue.
I learned the signs for words. Phrases. I understand a lot of…pieces. I miss a few words if they aren’t common, so I fingerspell those. But having full conversations is a little tough and hard to follow. It’s as if…
He bit the corner of his lip, trying to find the right way to write his thoughts. He huffed out a deep breath, finally giving up.
I’m not as fluent as people think I am, and it frustrates me. He shrugged again and ducked his head. It’s why I was nervous about video chatting with you. You’re better at it than I am and you would have picked up on it.
He communicated with Shaw, Julian, and Matt easily, but he wasn’t sure if that was because they signed slowly or that he likely focused more on reading their lips, using the signs to fill in words he might have missed. Gabriel and Natalie had a far better handle on the language. But that was likely because they had over two decades of practice with a grandfather who was deaf and chose ASL to communicate.
“Just because you’re deaf doesn’t mean you automatically know ASL. Sign language is more than just knowing the words. Words and phrases are the pieces. It’s the grammar that connects things. And like any language, it requires practice,” Gabriel said, waiting for Ben to acknowledge his words with a nod. “I had a lot of practice signing with my grandfather. If you want, you can practice with me.”
Ben chuckled at the funny twists of life. His hearing friend was more fluent in sign language than he was.
It was just a thought, Gabriel typed out on his phone, finishing with a shrug.
The words on Gabriel’s screen stole his breath. He quickly turned his head, not missing the sting of hurt in Gabriel’s expression before he quickly disguised it. Had Gabriel thought his chuckle was