glad I didn’t have any witnesses to that shit. I’d accepted that Rogue made me insane a long time ago. My mind was lost and I didn’t care to look for it. Because she was back. And that was all I’d wanted for so long that it’d been hard to remember what it was like before the last ten years had happened.
I think I’d been happy once. Now I only existed, did what had to be done, looked after my boys and just survived. For all the sunshine in this town, it had been as dark as winter for me since Rogue had left. But my light was finally back and I feared it going out again more than anything in the world. I was empty without her, soulless. I’d become a monster in the time we’d been parted and maybe she was never going to want me like this. But I had to try. I couldn’t be a good person for her, but I could be someone who always protected her, who gave her fucking everything. I’d carve a slice out of the moon if that was what my girl wanted. I’d figure out a way to get it done. She just had to say the word.
I pushed out of bed again in frustration. Where the fuck was she? It was almost three am now and there was no sound of any partying assholes returning home from their night out. I took my phone out, shooting her another text, but I was starting to think it was pointless. Was she always going to hate me like this? What the fuck was I supposed to do to make it right?
I’d dated a sum total of zero girls in any real way since she’d left. And before she’d left I’d dated zero girls period. I didn’t want anyone but her, I’d known that at a preciously young age. I’d been one intuitive fucker, I guess. But I knew the value of people like her. People who made everything worthwhile. People who listened and cared and gave their whole heart to you. I’d fucking ruined that when I was supposed to hold onto it no matter what. I just hadn’t had a choice. But this was my fucking second chance. So maybe I wasn’t going about it the right way, but I just couldn’t fucking give up.
I took Rogue’s vibrator from her drawer, envious of the damn thing. Better this than other men, but still. The asshole had been inside my girl without my permission, and I had some rage to vent. I dropped it to the floor, stamping on the smug little bastard, cracking it open as it took the full force of my rage. It started vibrating angrily and I stomped harder on the defiant rubber dick, booting it to death until the batteries rolled out. When it was in pieces, I kicked it under the bed and smiled satisfactorily. If the machines rose up and took over the world, I’d officially be naming myself the Vibratornator.
I walked over to Rogue’s closet again, flipping the door wide and pausing as I spotted her new cellphone sitting on the shelf, switched off with the SIM card laying on top of it. That was almost enough to make me crack a fucking tooth, but I guessed I knew she wasn’t actually ignoring my messages – she just wasn’t getting them because she’d disabled the fucking phone and left it here.
I blew out a frustrated breath and opened her panty drawer. There was a sparkly little thong amongst the mix of sexy shit and panties with childish pictures on like ponies and rabbits, even a few with the Green Power Ranger. Apparently she wasn’t over her little obsession with him and I kinda wanted to burn his face off of my girl’s panties, but I knew she loved this shit so I guessed I could let it fly. I was being reasonable after all.
I pulled out the sparkly thong and was even more pleased when I realised it was rainbow coloured. I ran my thumb over the inside of it and found myself getting hard. Seriously fucking hard. I hadn’t gotten laid since, ergh, fuck only knew. It was either the dancer chick or the nurse. But she’d definitely been brunette because I vaguely remembered fisting her hair while I bent her over something and pictured her as Rogue. Story of my life.
I wrapped Rogue’s panties in my fist as my cock strained