shit. He was grinning now, too. Smiling like a fucking fool. She still had that effect on him. His pulse thundered under his skin, hammered in his throat. She had to be saying yes. That must be her answer to his letter.
“Mine, too. Late flight, that is. Also, I’m not annoyed at all now,” he said, as hope rose inside him—the hope that they were flying in the same direction.
But when he asked, she was heading to Paris.
“Do you want to get a coffee?” she asked. “Or do you still detest coffee?”
“I would love to…have a tea,” he said with a smile, and she laughed, and this was good. So good. Like old times.
They headed to an ordinary airport café, ordered black coffee for her and tea for him, and sat at a small iron table as travelers filtered past them, talking about their trips, their plans, what they needed before their planes took off. It was white noise, the elevator music to this surreal slice of time.
Sitting here with her.
He wanted to cup this moment in the palm of his hands, to carry it and treat it like a precious object, like it could become what he’d once longed for so terribly—a future with her.
He had so much he wanted to say. Things like: “You’re beautiful. I miss you. Why couldn’t we find a way to stay together? Why did we have to drift apart? Did you get my letter and will you please, please, please tell me it’s the same for you?”
But when she lifted her hand to reach for her coffee, the breath escaped his chest in a cold rush.
The stone on her left hand was small, but shone brilliantly and horribly, slashing all his hopes.
His throat turned dry and his chest pinched. But he went for humor, needing it as a shield from the reality. He held up his hand, as if the sun had robbed him of sight. “Whoa. I think your ring blinded me.”
Annalise cast her eyes down at it, as if she just realized she was wearing it. She fiddled with it for a second then folded her hands in her lap. Out of sight. “I received your letter. I’m…engaged.”
Two short sentences that punctured his lungs. It was something he should have prepared for. Something he knew was always a possibility. But his heart squeezed too tight, and he gasped for breath as nothing but hurt coursed through him. As quickly as it surged, though, he tried to shut it down. To remind himself that he’d been rolling the dice anyway when he sent the letter, and the dice had come up empty.
He inhaled deeply, let the air fill his lungs, then put on his best face. “Congratulations are in order, then. Who’s the lucky guy?” he asked, taking the knife and digging it around in his chest a little more, carving out some of that beating organ.
“His name is Julien. We work together. He’s…wonderful,” she said, her voice faltering, as if she were embarrassed to admit that.
“I’m glad to hear,” he said, and he was, in a way, because she deserved someone wonderful. He’d just once believed that someone would be him. He’d believed it a week ago, a day ago, a few minutes ago.
He was a foolish romantic.
But really, what had he expected? That after not talking or writing, he would send a letter, and they’d magically run into each other then start back up again like some romantic movie?
Well, the thought had been front and center of his mind for the last five minutes, sure. Because when you see the love of your life out of the blue in an airport, it feels like the stars are lining up for you.
Now, it felt like a cruel twist of fate.
He picked up his tea, took a drink, then set it down. They talked and caught up on each other’s lives. They discussed their jobs, and their families. She told him about Noelle’s life, and he told her that Ryan and he were working for Army Intelligence, that Colin was finishing up college, acing every class, and Shannon was slated to graduate soon, too, and was engaged to be married to her college sweetheart.
The ease with which they had always spoken about everything tugged at his heart, but it reminded him, too, of all that was lost.
Lost with her.
They wouldn’t have this again. This was all there was, and he shouldn’t feel so let down. He hadn’t expected to see her. He