as Gardnerians just don’t speak of such things. And if I can’t even talk about this, how in the world am I going to jump clear into bed with him?
I straighten and unsuccessfully try to equal his penetrating gaze. “I want to be clear. You need to take things at my pace with this.”
Lukas looks surprised, but his voice, when it comes, is low and reassuring. “Of course.”
“You can be unpredictable and aggressive,” I counter.
His expression has turned serious, his deep-green eyes gilded by the firelight. “Elloren, I won’t be. Not with this.”
His unexpectedly caring tone dredges up something raw and vulnerable inside me. I bite my lip as tears sting my eyes once more.
Lukas pushes a loose strand of my hair behind my shoulder and moves closer, his gaze searching, his words low and firm. “We won’t fully seal our fasting until I’ve set you at ease.”
“Bring spirits,” I say, remembering the soothing effect of Valasca’s tirag.
“I’ll bring some wine,” Lukas offers.
“Strong wine,” I press.
“Elloren,” Lukas says as he caresses the side of my neck, his touch featherlight, his expression kind, “you won’t need it.”
My whole body is tense, but I manage a tight nod.
Lukas looks at me quizzically, his brow furrowed. The side of his lip pulls up a fraction as his silken voice lowers to a more intimate register and he leans in close. “You don’t need to worry, Elloren. I’m skilled at this.”
His attempt at reassurance has exactly the opposite effect. Mortification spikes and I take a step back from him. “I don’t want to know that about you. I don’t want to be one more...conquest of yours.” Images of Lukas with other women flit through my mind. I swallow, wildly uncomfortable as I look toward the curtained window, at the firelit floor, anywhere but at him as I’m faced with the uneasy realization that Lukas has never once told me that he loves me. And I’ve never once said it to him. “I wanted to share this with someone who it matters to,” I say, my voice catching.
Lukas caresses my arm. “It will.” His voice is strong and sure, a tendril of his fire reaching out for me.
I shake my head, not able to meet his eyes. “You don’t understand. You can’t possibly. I wanted this...to be significant.”
With someone I love and who loves me.
With Yvan.
When I finally look back up at Lukas, there’s a storm of emotion in his eyes that’s so intense a flush spreads down my neck. There’s strong hurt there. And I’m surprised and chastened by the realization that I’ve inadvertently landed such a stinging blow.
“Lukas, I’m sorry...”
His hand falls away and he straightens, as if collecting himself. But I can feel the turbulent emotions that are now coming off of him in waves. His struggle for control is visible in the rigid way he’s holding himself, in his palpable attempt to bring his suddenly unbridled fire under rein.
When his words finally come, they’re clipped. “Tomorrow, stay here until I send for you.”
“I will,” I concede, filled with remorse and feeling uncomfortably formal toward him.
“Try to get some sleep,” he says, averting his gaze from mine. “You’ll need to be sharp.”
I swallow and eye him searchingly. “You too.”
Lukas shoots me an enigmatic look, turns, and walks out the door.
Part Three
CHAPTER ONE
THREAT
SPARROW TRILLIUM
Sixth Month
Valgard, Gardneria
Sparrow stares at Lukas Grey in sheer astonishment. What he’s just revealed to her and Thierren is a life-altering thing.
A world-altering thing.
“Elloren Gardner is...the Black Witch?” Sparrow can barely get the words out, her mind spinning as if caught in a maelstrom.
“Are you sure?” Thierren asks Lukas. The light from a single lantern set on the storeroom table flickers over them all, midnight’s shadows darkening the estate.
“She’s told me everything about her power,” Lukas answers him with a poignant look. “And I’ve felt its magnitude. It’s leagues stronger than mine.”
Sparrow takes in the gravity that washes over Thierren’s face, his chiseled features stark in the lantern’s flickering light.
“You take her at her word that she’s on our side?” Sparrow presses them both. She meets Thierren’s pine green gaze, seeking the reason that jaded, cynical Thierren would believe this without question.
“Strong earth magery means they both have strong Dryad lineages,” Thierren explains, his gaze flicking toward Lukas. “Which means they can’t lie to each other. It’s physically impossible.”
Sparrow’s deep-seated rebellious streak gives a flare as she eyes these two Mages, gratified to hear them speak with such easy blasphemy about their Tree Fae blood—blood the Mage holy book staunchly