to stay with you. I’ve tried so many times to get to you, but every time I get close someone interferes,” the more I say it the more agitated I become.
“That’s because it wasn’t your time yet, Whitley. Just like now isn’t your time either. You can’t stay here, you have to go back,” she says again breaking my heart into a million pieces.
“Don’t make me go back! Please mom? Don’t make me go back.”
The sound of splintering wood could be heard for miles, but it’s all too close to me. I can’t open my eyes as I float in a world of cold nothingness.
“Whitley! What the fuck? What did he do to you? What did you take?” Mason’s voice is so clear, yet I can’t seem to respond to him. His hands are on me shaking me. “Wake up, Whitley. Don’t you fuckin’ do this to me,” he roars. I can vaguely hear him on his phone, but I can’t make out what he’s saying. My heart is breaking again, and my head is screaming.
Nothing is ever going to be the same again. Nothing can take this pain away. Why did I try? Why did I think that fucking anything with a dick could possibly ease the ache in my chest? Why did I think it could ease the fears that tug me deep down into the depths of hell?
“Goddamn it, Whitley!” Mason screams again. My body is being jerked in so many directions that I don’t know where I am anymore.
And for once, I’m at peace with that.
Chapter 13
Mason
I left her in that hospital two months ago. I couldn’t fucking face her after that. She did what she did for me, and for my club. I left the money in an envelope with the nurse at the hospital for her, so at least she got paid. I’ve tried to keep myself separate from this issue. She tried to kill herself in the motel bathroom and I will never forgive myself for being the reason behind it. I still don’t know what the hell happened with Armando. I don’t know what he did to break her, but that’s exactly what happened. He broke her.
“You still hung up on that shit?” Axle asks as he sits down next to me.
“I just don’t fuckin’ get it, man. She was good when we got there.” Shaking my head, I don’t want to think about this, and I damn sure don’t want to talk about it anymore. I want the fucking memory of what I did to go the fuck away, but it won’t. My goddamn dreams are haunted by visions of her.
“It’s been months, brother. Why don’t you just go see her?” he asks.
“Like fuckin’ hell I will. She ain’t mine Axle. Why the hell would I go after her like that?”
“Cause it’s fuckin’ with you, motherfucker,” Viking says from behind me. He slaps his hand on my shoulder. Glancing over my shoulder, I just shake my head at Viking.
“I’m good. As always. I don’t know what the fuck you dicks are talkin’ about,” I say before I bring my beer to my lips. I’ll admit that I have nightmares. I find her in that bathroom, but it isn’t her, it’s Briann. That alone sets me on edge. I know my sister is dead. I know she isn’t here anymore, but the sight I see is just too much.
“Walk with me,” Ink snaps at me. I shake my head once more before I shove off the stool and follow him outside. Stepping into the heat of Miami, sweat prickles at my neck almost immediately.
“I miss her too, Mason. She was one of us. She meant a lot to me, but you can’t keep blamin’ everything on yourself,” he says. Ink knows me better than any of the other guys. He was into Briann. He loved her in his own fucked up way. I knew they fucked around a few times, but I never realized until after she died just how deep their connection went.
“How do you know what I’m doin’? She isn’t Briann. What the hell Ink?” I question him. Taking a step toward him, he just chuckles. He doesn’t back down as he looks directly into my eyes.
“You think I don’t see it? The fuckin’ guilt? I see it Mason. I see it every goddamn day that you live without Briann. You’re doin’ it right now with that girl. You didn’t cause it. Whatever demons she was runnin’ from, they didn’t