she wanted to buy a house.”
Jade nodded. “Sure.”
“But things never really…” Matthew sighed. “Well, nothing worked out like she planned. The house that she wanted was more expensive than we could afford. So even though we both hated the company where we worked, we couldn’t quit, because it wasn’t part of the plan. She wanted to live in this neighborhood where all of our friends lived, and it was really expensive. She wanted to have a boat, because everyone else had a boat, and she even picked out the ring that she wanted me to propose with.”
“Wow.” Jade said. “Was it…nice?”
Matthew laughed. “It was expensive. But I went along with it – I mean, I went along with everything. I wanted to make her happy, and she seemed so sure about what we needed to be happy. I know it sounds dumb, but I didn’t really question it, you know?”
Jade nodded. “Oh believe me, I’m not one to judge an imperfect relationship. You met my ex-husband, right?”
He laughed. “Yeah, so…anyways. The night before I was going to propose, we were hanging out with some friends and people from work. And I walked in on Laura kissing this guy we used to work with.”
Jade gasped. “No!”
“Yeah.” Matthew shrugged. “She swore it was the first time anything happened – he’d always flirted with her and she let it go too far. She begged me not to tell anyone, and she begged me not to ruin the life we’d planned. But after that, nothing was really the same. I realized that all of the plans we had were her plans. But I couldn’t even be mad at her for long. She was looking for something else because she was unhappy, too.”
Jade studied him. He looked perfectly whole now, but obviously that wasn’t always the case. “That all sounds…devastating.”
Matthew shook his head. “It was actually one of the best things that ever happened to me. I didn’t realize how unhappy I was until I could clearly see how unhappy she was. I quit my job, returned the ring, went to the police academy, and moved out here. I was free, for the first time in years.”
“So when she moved out here…”
Matthew sighed. “Yeah, that was a surprise. And it was her idea. She thought that she could win me back. Laura’s not a bad person, she really isn’t. She just…I don’t know, she’s too afraid to face what she actually wants? And nothing had really changed between us – we were just as unhappy, but we were here. She wanted to force us into a mold that didn’t make sense. We fought about joining this country club like every weekend. I don’t even know what you do at a country club.”
Jade laughed. “Neither do I.”
He leaned forward slightly. “And that’s the story. I wasn’t a perfect boyfriend by any means, but I didn’t cheat. I never even told my family or friends the whole truth. It would destroy her too much and endanger her career there. I just left. But…I wanted you to know the truth.”
“I could never think badly of you. I mean, you have to know that. You literally saved my life – you’re the hero of San Juan.”
He groaned. “Yeah, I know. Too bad I couldn’t have kept that private too.”
She laughed. “I know. So does everyone back home think you’re just this heartless loon who moved across the country for no reason?”
“Pretty much. But that’s okay. And I’m sorry that I cut you off with my TED Talk – you wanted to say something?”
Jade nodded. She opened her mouth to speak but wasn’t sure what to say. She’d gone over it a hundred times in her head, but could never find the words “I guess – well…”
She stopped herself and looked up him. He was staring at her intently with those beautiful eyes, a half amused smile on his face.
She took a deep breath. “I’m not really sure how to say this.”
“You don’t have to be scared of me,” he said.
Jade studied him in the firelight – she wished that she could freeze this moment forever. For the first time all day, she felt like her thoughts had calmed down. She was completely at ease. She wasn’t afraid of Matthew – not at all. In this moment, she wasn’t even afraid of him knowing how she felt. He didn’t seem like he’d be one to kiss and tell…
She stepped closer to him. “I need to tell you a secret.”
He smiled.