Vanya when he felt like a bad parent and needed a pep talk.
Vanya knew nothing of the connection the three of us shared.
“Come over.”
“Den, I can’t. I told Vanya I’d—”
“Cancel. She’ll understand. Something’s up, and you need to get over here now.”
“You’re freaking me out.”
I moved to the front window and stared at the dark street. The sun went down early in the wintertime. It was quiet, the cold keeping most people indoors. It was a clear night. Stars hung in the sky, sharp and bright against a black canvas.
“I don’t think Edison’s going to school, and he’s snuck into the house in the middle of the night the last two nights. Late. Really late. His room reeks of alcohol and… sweaty men. He’s gone again. I don’t know where he is or who he’s with.”
Silence. Then, “I told you he was too young for this. He’s impulsive and immature. He’s probably out there having a temper tantrum because we won’t give him what he wants. Fucking brat. I’m on my way. When Vanya yells at me, I’m blaming you.”
Harley hung up, and I stayed by the window, praying my instincts were wrong, that Harley was wrong, that Edison would show up and explain away my concerns.
It was twenty minutes before Harley pulled into the driveway. I hadn’t moved. He stormed out of the car and to the front door, anger etched in every line of his body.
I had the door open before he could knock or barge in.
“I did this, didn’t I? This is on me.” Of course he blamed himself.
“No. That’s not fair. We don’t even know what’s going on.”
“I’ll tell you what’s going on.” Harley kicked off his boots and shucked his jacket, tearing it from his arms and throwing it on the floor before marching down the hall to the spare room. “He’s having a whiny-ass tantrum and decided to go fuck around because he couldn’t get what he wanted from us fast enough. He thinks he’s sticking it in our fucking faces right now.”
“You’re making assumptions.”
Harley stopped in the middle of the room, scanning, nose in a permanent wrinkle. “You keep telling me to put myself in his shoes, to remember what it was like to be twenty. Well, if this was me at twenty, I’d be hammered, high, and getting my dick wet anywhere I could.”
I couldn’t argue with that. He was right.
“God, he’s a fucking slob.” Harley kicked at a pile of dirty clothes before yanking open the drawer on the bedside table and rifling through it. He tossed condoms and lube on the unmade bed. “Half a brain, that’s what he’s got. At least he has enough sense to use this shit.”
“So, what do we do?”
“We sit on your fucking couch and wait for his sorry ass to come stumbling in the door later.”
“He’s not a kid, as much as you think he is. If this is what he wants to do, then it’s his choice, right?”
“Wrong,” Harley roared, pointing a finger at me. “He agreed to this. To us. He agreed there wouldn’t be other people. If he’s so fucking grown-up, then he could have at least owned it if it wasn’t going to work for him. This is petulant behavior. He’s angry because I needed five fucking seconds to organize my head before jumping into bed with him.”
Harley was vibrating. He tore his hands through his hair and glanced around the room again. I didn’t miss the hurt he was trying to hide. If what he believed of Edison was true, then it was a low-blow, and Edison had succeeded in hurting his dad.
I stepped into the room, took Harley’s hand, and pulled him against me, kissing his temple and holding him for a minute while he calmed. He relaxed by a few degrees and held me back, sighing and hooking his chin on my shoulder.
“I’m sorry. I’ve been a wreck lately. I want him so fucking badly, Den. I just don’t want to make more mistakes. My life has just been one big clusterfuck of shit.”
“I know. This isn’t on you. Come on,” I said. “Let’s put a movie on or something.” I took him to the living room, and he collapsed on the couch, looking worn out and tired.
“Don’t you work in the morning?” he asked.
“Yeah. I have a ton of sick days. I’ll use one. This is important.”
“He’ll probably be too drunk to reason with when he gets home.”
“Maybe. In which case, we’ll wait until morning.”
“And if