and I followed along with her unspoken instruction.
“All right, dig in everyone,” Iris said. “Seriously. You don’t want to make me reheat these dishes. They’re not very good on the second go-round.”
I chuckled to myself before I did as I was told, bringing my plastic fork up to my Styrofoam container, steam still rolling off its lid.
“Was Iris acting weird to you?” I asked Derek as we sat beside each other at the table.
Eddie, Iris, and Austin were long gone, each one of them disappearing back to their respective rooms once dinner was over. Derek and I had since been engaged in a game of passive Blackjack after I dug a stack of cards out of one dad’s old boxes. I couldn’t help but smile when I found the cards, the symbols on them reminding me so much of better times spent playing the game with my dad on the porch in the months before he’d passed away.
“What do you mean by acting weird?” Derek replied, his eyes focused on the stack of cards resting in between us. “Hit me.”
I flipped over a card from the stack before I went on. “You know, acting weird. She kept staring over at you and stuff, like she was trying to look through your soul. You didn’t notice that?”
“Not really, no,” Derek said. “Hit me again.”
I flipped over another card as I let out a loud hum. “It’s just not like her. I mean, if it was anyone other than Iris, I might think that she just had a harmless crush on you or something but—”
“But I’m not crush-worthy?” Derek grinned.
“No. You’re a guy,” I explained. “Iris isn’t interested in guys. Honestly, it’s rare that Iris is interested in anyone. I swear, I think she’s only had like two girlfriends since I’ve known her.”
“Well, maybe I’m the exception that proves the rule,” Derek mused. “Or maybe it’s because she seems to think she knows everything about me, despite our limited conversations.”
“Wait. Everything about you?” I pressed. “Did she say something like that?”
“Something like that, yeah,” Derek went on. “She… pretty much assumed that I was interested in you, long before I even thought of things between us that way. I mean, I was starting to think of things between us that way, but she called it out before I’d even said it out loud.”
“Yeah, that sounds like Iris.” I chuckled. “I swear, she’s like a mind-reader sometimes.”
Derek sighed in response. “I’m just not used to someone being able to see through me. And with something like this—”
“Something like this?”
“I’m not supposed to be interested in you, Parker, remember?” Derek replied. “And if Iris already has us figured out, that means she can tell whoever she feels like telling about us, and it’d actually be the truth. Hell, she could even tell Viv—”
“And you don’t want her to tell Viv because you’re worried about your professional rep?” I pressed. “Or you don’t want anyone to find out about us, at all?”
“Parker—”
“Which one is it, Derek?” I placed my hands flat on the table. “You already told me that this is only supposed to be a temporary thing between us. Does it also need to be kept top secret, too?”
“You’re misunderstanding me, Parker.” Derek sighed again. “I just don’t like people knowing my business, professional or otherwise. It’s better for me to keep things close to the vest, especially since I’m functioning as your security. People knowing that I care about you, that I really care about you… there are a lot of bad people out there who might try to use that against me if they ever needed leverage.”
“That makes sense,” I murmured before I finished with my thoughts. “You’re right. I’m sorry for being so sensitive about it. I was just… I don’t want to be treated like a secret. It makes me feel like you’re… embarrassed about being with me or something.”
“Trust me, Parker. It’s got nothing to do with any of that.” Derek offered me a smile. “I’m just doing my job, and part of my job is keeping you safe. And that includes keeping some things under wraps on my end.”
“Right. You’re just doing your job,” I replied underneath my breath.
Just doing his job.
There was something painful about the phrase even though I knew that he didn’t mean anything by it. For some reason, it felt like he’d just cut me in half, like he’d just told me the worst thing he could’ve ever said.
Because he’d just reminded me that