me, then I had just walked right into a trap.
At least I got one last blowjob before I got a bullet in the skull.
And what a fucking blowjob it was.
I nearly jumped out of my skin when I heard another car pull up next to mine. It took me a second to adjust, but I realized that it was Thom.
I climbed out. “What’s going on, asshole?” I asked as he cut his engine.
He opened his door. “What?”
“I said, why did you call me out here?”
“Shit, man.” He looked nervous and kept glancing around. “I found something big.”
That made me pause. “Something big?”
“Yeah, man. Something big. Something we can maybe use, I don’t know. But I’m fucking terrified that they know, you know?”
“Slow down. What are you talking about?”
“The other day, you came to me.”
“Yeah. What did you find?”
He took a deep breath and held up a packet of papers. “I found these.”
I reached out and took them from him. He leaned up against the hood of his car, practically shaking like a small dog.
“Okay, some papers. Great. Why are you so nervous?”
“I’m afraid they caught me, man.”
He was talking fast and twitching slightly. I knew right away that he was on something, though I wasn’t sure what.
“Thom. Start from the beginning.”
He took another deep breath. “Okay, shit. I got a text about some meeting going down at their usual spot, this shitty bar outside town. I usually don’t go, but they keep me in the loop, just in case.”
“Why don’t you go?”
“I’m small time, you know? I don’t want to bring attention.”
“But you went this time.”
“Yeah, man. You told me to get you something. Anyway, I showed up, and it was just the usual bullshit. I hung out, said my piece, you know, gave my little report on the dealings, and that was that.”
“So where did you get this?” I said, holding up the papers.
“Everyone started getting fucked up, right? Doing blow and all that shit, drinking a lot. I partook a little bit, as usual, but then when things started getting really fucking nuts I snuck into the back room.” He paused and looked around again. His paranoia was beginning to make sense: he was clearly more messed up than I’d realized.
“So I snuck back there and started going through their shit. I found those papers, thought they looked important. I was gonna grab more but someone saw me. I don’t think they realized what I was doing, I made some excuse up or whatever, but fuck, man, I stole those papers.”
I looked down at the stack in my hand and started to read through them.
“Am I totally fucked?” he said after a minute.
“Shut up. I’m reading.”
It began to make sense, why he thought the papers were important. The more I read, the more my heart started beating harder, excitement beginning to rise.
On the surface they were normal papers. It was a deed of ownership, plus some expense reports, for the Blue. There was nothing particularly out of the ordinary about them.
Except the fact that they were in some gangster’s private office. Why the fuck would mobsters from Canada own some shitty diner in Ridgewood?
“You did good,” I said to Thom.
“Yeah, you think so?”
“Definitely. Do you know what these mean?”
He shook his head. “Someone owns the Blue, I guess. Seems weird, right?”
“Very weird.” I almost started laughing as it dawned on me. “You know why gangsters would own a diner?”
“No fucking clue, man. Maybe they really like fucking burgers and fries?”
“Do you know what money laundering is?”
He shrugged. “Heard it before on TV. Not really sure how it works, though.”
“It’s what people that sell drugs or shit like that have to do with all their cash. See, they can’t just start spending it or else the government is going to notice. What they need to do is somehow make it legal and taxable so they can start spending it again, all legit and whatnot.”
“What’s that have to do with the Blue?”
“Money laundering works by taking a legit revenue stream, like a fucking shitty diner, and slipping that illegal money into it.”
Thom looked at me blankly. “How’s that happen?”
“Basically they put the cash into the registers and cook the books to make it all look legit.”
“How does this help us?”
“We know where their money is. We have some leverage now.”
He nodded. “If we know where the money is, we know where to hurt them.”
“Exactly.”
“Shit, Climber. You’re one devious motherfucker.”
“I know that. But listen, you might want to lay low for