behind us.
The crone grinned, and her teeth were possibly even more perfect than mine.
#INeedMagic.
“No one enters unless I allow them. The gods will remain outside. For now.”
Cronus narrowed his eyes on her, crossing huge beefy arms. “How did we get to your door, then?”
She shot him a snarly glare. “My magic has never worked on you, Cronus, you bastard. You know that.”
He almost smiled at that. Almost. “I still like to remind you,” he said, sounding just like the arrogant and smug god-slash-Titan that he was.
The crone muttered under her breath, and just in case she was casting a spell, I blurted out: “How long have you lived here? It’s gorgeous.”
It really wasn’t. The single room was sparse and dusty, with a couch, a bed—both in shades of brown—and a cliché “magic cauldron” in the corner surrounded by a bunch of jars and bottles. “Really love what you’ve done with the place…” I trailed off. My ability to lie only went so far.
She shot a glance at Cronus. “Bet you’re regretting tying yourself to such an annoying human…”
He didn’t say anything, which was a step in the right direction for our relationship. “Follow me,” the crone said as she turned and walked back into the corner where the cauldron was.
I stayed close to Cronus, all the while keeping an eye on the woman. She led us to the corner, pressed her hand to multiple jars, almost like she was straightening them, and then murmured something that sounded like, “Alensora.” A puff of dust flew up, and the floor started to shake slightly, followed by the walls. I expected the jars to move about and clink together as the wall shifted open, but they didn’t.
“Stay close. This is my private quarters, and it’s not safe to wander about.”
Right, okay, then.
#We’reFucked
Chapter 5
The front room was a decoy. Which explained why a hot witch who was apparently hundreds—thousands?—of years old, and immortal, would leave it as such a shithole. The real gem lay behind the wall, and I was pretty sure I could spend an eternity here.
“If one picture ends up on the ‘Gram,” the crone said, snapping her fingers in my dreamy face, “I will make you suffer for an eternity. Do not push me.”
I held both hands up, somehow dropping my phone into my bag at the same time. “Wait, how do you know about Instagram?”
The witch snorted. “Girl, I have like a hundred thousand followers on there. Islandwitch201, all one word. Look me up.”
A hundred thousand. Motherfucker!
“Yeah, sure, I’ll totally look you up.”
#NeverHappening.
“I’m CaliBlonde414 if you want to follow me,” I added.
She gave me a fake smile and we both knew that neither would be following the other.
Pissed off, I couldn’t stand to look at her any longer, so I decided to take in more of the gorgeous room. There were no windows, seeing as this was her secret lair and all, but she must have used magic to give one of the far walls a perfect beach scene. It looked real. I could almost feel the sunlight and hear the birds as I stared out across the blue water.
“It’s a memory of mine. Maui,” she said, noticing my focus. “The water is about the only good thing in this godsforsaken world.”
Cronus’ chest rumbled. “We didn’t forsake it. We’ve been trying to bring it back under control. Humans are like a fungus. You get rid of one and another ten pop up.”
Okay, not creepy at all. And yet vaguely accurate.
The crone made her way back to a small room off to the side, sliding open the barn doors to present us with what looked like a weapons forge. “It will take me a day and night to complete your weapon. You will remain here. You will not use your power and bring more gods to my door. You will not have sex on my bed.”
Cronus and I just stared at her blankly, then she shut the barn door silently. Shaking my head, I turned and took in the room. Light wood floors, almost whitewashed, with paneled white walls, gave it a very coastal Hampton’s vibe. Her couches were the big, squishy variety, somehow still looking elegant and refined—white—of course—with thin blue piping across the cushions. There were rugs scattered everywhere, and they were thick and expensive, my feet sinking into the weave as I crossed to sit gingerly on the couch. I was probably covered in sand from our run here, and I wondered how she would react to me