Raine (Gods of the Fifth Floor #2) - M.V. Ellis Page 0,39
for his discarded pants with one hand, while he pulled me into his lap again with the other. I straddled him and lowered myself down. He held his hand out to me, palm turned upwards. I took the condom and did the honors.
It seemed like a weirdly intimate thing to be doing with a guy I hardly knew, but then I had to laugh at the absurdity of the notion, because, of course, having sex with a guy I’d known for two days wasn’t overly intimate at all. Insert sarcasm.
Absurd or not, out of character or not, rash or not, foolish or not, I did want to have sex with Raine Davies. The part of my brain that generated the chatter telling me not to do things had been silenced, or at least drowned out by the part that had been suppressed or neglected for too long, and by the voice of Michelle and my therapist telling me that I couldn’t put my life on hold forever. Reminding me that, eventually, I had to get out there and live it.
That being the case, Raine had said something about bending me over the couch and fucking me from behind, and as appealing as that sounded, it wasn’t what I wanted. I wanted to be present and aware, and face what we were doing head on. I wanted to see and feel the whole thing. I didn’t want to hide from myself, or my feelings, or my actions, because I wanted to look them, and Raine, in the eye, and feel, and own every single fucking one.
I raised myself up so that I was hovering above him, then I reached down for his dick, and squeezed it hard. The look of pleasure on his face went straight to my G-spot. He was hot, there was no denying that, but that wasn’t the main thing that I was attracted to. There was something else that had drawn me to him from the first moment we met. Something I recognized in myself. He wasn’t everything he seemed to be to the outside world, and that intrigued me.
I pushed the thought to the back of my mind and focused on what was going on in the here and now. More specifically, the aching need between my legs that was only increasing as his dick throbbed urgently in my hand. I wanted him so badly, it was criminal.
Not breaking eye contact, I hovered above him a moment too long, watching him as he studied me. I could still stop this. I still had the opportunity not to make the colossal mistake I knew this was going to be. I could get dressed, leave, and call the agency the next morning to tell them I wouldn’t be returning. So what if they never hired me again? Someone else would. I waited a beat, then two, then three.
A small moan escaped his tightly pressed lips as I lowered myself onto him. And I had to bite mine to stop from doing the same. My God, he was... this was... I didn’t even know what words completed those thoughts. I just knew that the feeling of him inside me, of him staring me down while I struggled to maintain some semblance of control, was like nothing else I’d ever experienced.
I paused again to collect my thoughts, but my reverie was interrupted by Raine as he moved his hands to my thighs, gripping them a little too tightly. He rocked his hips up slowly, once, then stopped momentarily. When I didn’t respond, he did the same, but this time harder and faster. Still nothing from me. I wasn’t sure if the light that came on behind his eyes was anger or pleasure, but it was as though a switch had flicked, and it was all on.
Before I could register what he was doing, he’d flipped us so that I was sitting on the couch, and he was bearing down on me. I should have known that it was too much to expect him to let me be in control. That wasn’t his MO in the way he conducted himself in any other aspect of this life that I’d seen so far, so I wasn’t surprised that he was the same in bed. I had the impression that everything with Raine was his way or the highway. He was unapologetically him, and he expected other people to fall into line or go to hell.