down in front of her. “Yes, I am.”
Her fingers ached to trace the smile that was on his lips. He was so earnest.
“You made me another list.”
“It is a very long list, but if we follow every point, I believe we can make it work. I know our relative positions in society, not to mention the fact that you have met some of my friends, may seem like insurmountable obstacles, but I am willing to face them if it means in the end I can be with the one person who believes my smile makes me as beautiful as a duck.”
She closed her eyes and let the soft laugh bubble up from deep inside of her. “But two years and seven months! It is so long. Even if that plan of yours worked.”
“It will work.”
“I don’t know if I am that patient.”
“You are Patience.” He tugged on one of the curls at the nape of her neck. “And I think it is high time I learned of your surname. It was quite strange to write that plan not even knowing your surname.”
“Kendrick.” She waited for his reaction. Patience Kendrick. It wasn’t a common name.
He smiled. “Patience Kendrick. Miss Kendrick. That has a beautiful ring to it. I wish I could have been calling you that all the time we have known one another.”
“No one calls me Miss Kendrick.”
“No, but they will once you are established in Kent.” He took her hands in his, not understanding her meaning. “I know we technically don’t get engaged for another few years, but will you do it? Will you marry me, Miss Kendrick, and allow me to call you Patience, not because you are a maid but because I have the right as your betrothed?”
Mr. Woodsworth was once again on his knees proposing to her, and this time, it was no mistake. His fingertips slid from her hair to trace the bottom of her jaw. He leaned forward and placed his mouth near her ear. The stubble from his cheek grazed her own. How could something so rough feel so gentle? “I haven’t been able to sleep since picturing what my life could be like with you always in it. Please put me out of this misery and say yes.”
All she had to do was say yes. It was on the tip of her tongue. Her hands started to shake. Her eye twitched . . . She wanted to lie. She squeezed his hands more tightly in order to stop the shaking, but she couldn’t.
“Miss Kendrick, you are shaking.” He bowed low and kissed each of her hands.
She couldn’t tell him yes, no matter how much she wanted to. Her life was not in her own hands. If she had truly been a maid, she could have had him. She would lean forward and not bother to answer him in words. Only his lips had responded to her during their first kiss, but what would it be like to kiss him now? When he would actually welcome it? As much as she wanted to, she couldn’t.
It would be a lie.
“Your plan is very sound.”
He kissed the inside of her wrist. “Thank you.”
“And very detailed.”
He repeated the motion, this time with her other wrist. “I know.”
“But it will not work.” His hands went limp in her own. “I wish it could. I can’t even tell you how much I wish it could. But I’m not free. I don’t get to choose my own future. If I could, this is the one I would pick. It is beautiful. Thank you, Mr. Woodsworth, for allowing me to think it possible for a moment. I am afraid it might be the most beautiful moment I will ever have.”
“What do you mean, you aren’t free? Have you betrothed yourself to some other man I don’t know about?”
“No, it isn’t a betrothal.”
His eyebrows furrowed, and he slowly dropped her hands. “What do you mean?”
There was a commotion in the hallway outside the door. The front door slammed.
“Where is Mr. Woodsworth?” Nicholas had never been soft-spoken when he was angry. At least he was in control enough not to run through the house screaming her name.
“He is in his study.” Mr. Gilbert’s voice was softer, but still, she could hear him. “Would you like me to announce you or send your card in?”
“No need” was Nicholas’s curt reply.
Patience jumped out of Mr. Woodsworth’s chair, knocking it over in her rush. “I’m so sorry, Mr. Woodsworth.” What she wouldn’t give to have