first days when I’d fallen in love as a young woman, despite my grandmother’s warnings. Hot on the heels of that had come heartbreak, albeit temporarily. Hayden had come back to me. He had made his choice, and we’d not looked back since.
But we needed to address what was happening to us here. In just two weeks, Brazil and Camp Bano were changing us both.
“You were wonderful this morning,” I told him truthfully. “I was so proud of you, up there at the lectern.”
Hayden looked almost boyishly pleased, basking in my approval. “Really? I was so nervous. I only had a vague idea of what I was going to say, but then it all seemed to pour out of me. As though God gave me the words.”
“And I’m sure He did. Your words were so personal, but also inspired. You’re a natural at preaching, Hayden.” I’d never thought those words would come out of my mouth, and although I meant them, I wondered what they would lead to.
His eyes brightened and it almost hurt my heart to see the hope in them. “You really think so?”
I nodded. “Most definitely, but the question is...what are we going to do about it? I think we both know you can’t just go back to building.”
He nodded slowly and opened his mouth to say something but the passador arrived with the first round of skewers. The restaurant was a traditional rodizio with passadors serving the choicest cuts of meat. It was much richer fare than the nutritious but basic meals we were served at the camp. By an unspoken agreement, we put the conversation on hold while we took full advantage of the seemingly endless supply of the most delicious food I’d ever tasted. We chatted and laughed, and every time our gazes met, I felt a tingle in my stomach as though it was a first date again. I would have happily not brought up the subject of Hayden’s preaching again, since I didn’t want to spoil the evening in any way, but I didn’t want it to be the elephant in the room, either.
“So,” I said, wiping my mouth with a napkin, “your preaching this morning?”
Nodding, he took my hand again and looked into my eyes. “I do sense that God is calling me to something more, that a new chapter is opening for us. I know that might scare you after all this time. I know it does me, but whatever comes out of this will have to be something we agree on together.”
As he stroked my palm with his fingertips, tears sprung to my eyes, although I wasn’t sure why. It wasn’t sadness, but it wasn’t exactly happiness, either. More a recognition that we were on the precipice of something big, and I was both nervous and excited. I wanted to trust but felt something holding me back. “I love you, Hayden,” I whispered as a tear rolled down my cheek.
Concern filled his face as he wiped it away.
“I’m behind you,” I continued. “Whatever you need us to do, I’ll do it. You were so inspiring this morning, and you’ve supported my dreams for long enough, and now it’s time I supported yours.” As I spoke the words, a weight lifted. Yes, I was nervous, even scared of the unknown, but it would be okay. We were husband and wife, a team, and as long as we followed the Lord’s leading, we would be okay.
Hayden squeezed my hand and looked as though he could cry as well. He lifted my hand to his lips and kissed it.
A tremor ran through my body, and not just from his kiss. This was a momentous occasion. A turning point. One I had dreaded for so long, but now that it was happening, it was like we were at the start of an exciting, unknown journey. “So now what?” I asked.
Hayden shrugged. “Honestly? I don’t know. We can’t just drop everything and go into ministry somewhere. There are the kids, the house, your career... All I know is that I need to follow this call.”
“To be a preacher?”
He shrugged again. “Maybe. But I don’t feel any more enamoured by the idea of becoming my father than I ever did. I don’t think heading up a little church at home is what I’m meant to do.”
“Well, that means no bake sales for me.” I laughed lightly as a wave of relief flowed through me.
“I look at David and Julia,” he continued, “and I think, that