with his eyebrows raised and a twinkle in his eye.
“Okay, not exactly, but my point—and I have one—is that you and Sheri aren’t operating in the real world here,” I said. “I understand that Sheri is feeling quite victorious, having won you, but that doesn’t mean she should wed you. I mean, why do you have to marry her? Why can’t you just live in sin like other old people?”
“Because we love each other and we want to be married.”
“You can’t know this so soon,” I argued. “It’s not possible. Her representative hasn’t even left yet.”
My dad frowned, clearly not understanding.
“The first six months to a year, you’re not really dating a person,” I explained. “You’re dating their representative. The real person, the one who leaves the seat up and can’t find the ketchup in the fridge even when it’s right in front of him, doesn’t show up until months into the relationship. Trust me.”
“What are you talking about? Of course I’m dating a person. I can assure you, Sheri is very much a woman,” he said. “Boy howdy, is she.” The tips of his ears turned red, and I felt my own face get hot with embarrassment. I forged on.
“Dad, first, ew,” I said. “And second, a person’s representative is their best self. After two weeks, you haven’t seen the real Sheri yet. The real Sheri is hiding behind the twenty-four-seven perfect hair and makeup, the placid temper, the woman who thinks your dad jokes are funny. They’re not.”
“No, no, no.” He shook his head. “I’ve seen her without makeup. She’s still beautiful. And she does have a temper—just drive with her sometime. I’ve learned some new words. Very educational. And my dad jokes are too funny.”
I rolled my eyes. I was going to have to do some tough love here. I was going to have to be blunt.
“Dad, I hate to be rude, but you’re giving me no choice. She’s probably only marrying you for your money,” I said. Ugh, I felt like a horrible person for pointing it out, but he needed protection from gold diggers. It was a kindness, really.
To my surprise, he actually laughed. “Sheri is more well off than I am by quite a lot. I’m the charity case in this relationship.”
“Then why on earth does she want to marry you?” I asked.
The words flew out before I had the brains to stifle them. It was a nasty thing to say. I knew that, but I was freaked out and frantic and not processing very well.
“I didn’t mean that the way it sounded,” I began, but he cut me off.
“Despite what you think, I’m quite a catch in middle-aged circles.”
He stood, retrieving his coat from a nearby coatrack. As he shrugged into it, a flash of hurt crossed his face that made my stomach ache. I loved my father. I wouldn’t inflict pain upon him for anything, and yet I had. I’d hurt him very much. I felt lower than sludge.
“I’m sorry, Dad. Really, I didn’t mean—” But again he cut me off.
“You did mean it, and, sadly, I’m not even surprised,” he said. “Listen, I have mourned the loss of your mother every day since she passed, and I will mourn her every day for the rest of my life, but I have found someone who makes me happy, and I want to spend my life with her. That doesn’t take away what I had with your mother.”
“Doesn’t it?” I argued. This. This was what had been bothering me since his announcement. How could he not see that by replacing my mother, he was absolutely diminishing what they’d had? “Sheri’s going to take your name, isn’t she? And she’s going to move into our house, right? So everything that was once Mom’s—the title of Mrs. Glen Martin and the house where she loved and raised her family—you’re just giving to another woman. The next thing I know, you’ll tell me I have to call her Mom.”
A guilty expression flitted across his face.
“No.” I shook my head. “Absolutely not.”
“I’m not saying you have to call her that. It’s just Sheri’s never had a family of her own, and she mentioned in passing how much she was looking forward to having daughters. It would be nice if you could think about how good it would be to have a mother figure in your life again.”
“I am not her daughter, and I never will be,” I said. My chest heaved with indignation. “How can you pretend