no requirements for holding the head of the household position beyond everyone in the household agreeing on it. Some households share power. Those households exist to vex people.”
“Doesn’t matron just mean married woman anyway?”
“It does.”
“That is the dumbest damned thing I’ve ever heard.”
The woman grinned at that. “I won’t claim to understand the idiocies of the rich. I just accept their paychecks with a smile, visit my kids whenever they want to see me, and enjoy not having to pay for their upkeep and education. That’s on their fathers.”
“You get to see your kids?”
“Yes. It’s illegal to falsify a birth certificate, and courtesans of either gender are not fiscally responsible for their kids. We’re guaranteed visitation should we want it, too. Their fathers aren’t bad men, and I usually go for dinner once or twice a week when I can.”
“That seems so bizarre to me.”
“They wanted heirs, not trophy wives. Courtesans are a good way to get heirs without having to deal with the wife. Uncontested courtesans, like you, are for the families who want the heirs and the wife. Or husband. And if you prove to be barren, they can’t cancel the contract—and if he proves to be barren, they can’t cancel the contract. You can agree to a surrogate contract, however. Your eggs and his sperm if viable.”
“That’s pretty fucked up, doc.”
“Ah. Right. Names. I’m sorry. I’m Dorothy. No, I won’t click my heels for you, but I’ll make sure you’re put back together without any complications. I’m a witch, I’m damned good at my job, and I’ve been studying medicine for over a decade. I’m experienced, and as long as all your pieces are in the same room, chances are I can put you back together again.”
“How about spleens with bullets through them?”
“As your spleen is non-vital, and complications and blood loss can be severe, it’s usually safer to sacrifice the spleen rather than try to restore the spleen. We were warned you’d suffered catastrophic damage to at least one organ. I’m relieved it was your spleen, but I’ll have to look into your various options and immune system management. You can live without your spleen, but it does serve a purpose in the body.”
“Well, it’s a good thing I can live without my spleen, as it is probably in a trash can somewhere.”
“It’s not if the hospital followed proper protocols. Human organs unsuitable for transplant are supposed to be immediately cremated. But, we are talking about the Alley, which has a very limited supply of competent doctors and nurses. That’s no offense to you, but more a reflection of the Alley’s current situation. Most doctors and nurses are not willing to risk death in the Alley right now, not with the storms worsening.”
How nice. The people in the East monitored the Alley’s woes. I forced myself to keep my eyes on the prize, which involved wrapping my hands around the necks of the murderous bastards behind the storms.
If my buyer could afford my ridiculous price tag, they had money to spare, and money to spare meant they had the resources necessary to deal with my problem. I’d bargain to get what I wanted, and I had no doubt in my mind my perverted fox would jump at the chance to have entire litters of children.
She was happiest watching little ones grow up.
The instant she clued in the creator of the storms ultimately killed children, she’d ride my ass until I put a permanent end to them, and I would go with her flow because I wanted to.
“Yeah. The storms are worsening,” I agreed. “There are funeral pyres daily in the outskirts.”
“Disease must be rampant.”
“It can get bad during the storm season. There are a lot of bodies, and we can’t always get to them all.”
Dorothy pushed me down the hall. “Have you contracted any diseases?”
“I’m not rabid, if that’s what you mean. They put the rabid down in the Alley. Usually too late to treat them, and the ones who could be treated can’t afford the treatments.”
“That wasn’t quite what I meant, but I am rather alarmed that’s the first conclusion you came to. I meant more like the measles, cholera, typhoid, or diphtheria.”
“Oh. I’ve gotten sick a few times, but I got better without medical intervention. I couldn’t tell you what I had. I never went to a doctor. Let’s just say doctors were a little out of my budget. I had my childhood vaccinations here anyway, but I haven’t had any adult ones. Frankly,