dishonest. That I’m not good enough for Josh to have had a relationship with.
Dragging a hand over his neck, Adam sighed heavily. ‘I can’t take the words back, Kim. I can only hope that you’ll accept my apology and allow me… Cassie and me… to try to make amends.’
Kim nodded thoughtfully and turned to look out of the window.
Cassie reached to place a hand over hers. ‘We were wrong to make assumptions about you, Kim. Adam didn’t mean the things he said. He was scared, that was all, for me. He couldn’t bear the thought of me finding hope only to have it snatched away. We were both upset the day you came. It was Josh’s birthday, and…’ She stopped, her voice catching.
‘I know.’ Kim looked sadly back at her. ‘That’s why I decided to come. I thought that… I don’t know. I suppose I thought you’d be pleased; that you would want Samuel to be part of your life.’
‘We do,’ Cassie said emphatically. ‘You have no idea how much. We were shocked when you arrived on our doorstep, naturally. And mortified when we realised we’d driven you away. We’re desperate to try to… Look, can we pull over?’ She glanced at Adam. ‘I know you haven’t got long, Kim, but if we could just have five minutes. I don’t want you to do anything because of your circumstances that you’ll regret.’
Kim considered. ‘Okay,’ she said, at length. Did the woman realise that she was also being judged? she wondered.
‘Do you mind if we walk?’ Cassie asked, as Adam drew up at the kerb.
He certainly was trying to make amends, around to her door to open it before she’d unfastened her belt, offering her a hand to assist her out.
‘You said you were considering putting Samuel up for adoption,’ said Cassie. ‘Are you still of the same mind?’
‘I wouldn’t be considering it if I didn’t think it would be the best option for him,’ Kim pointed out, still obviously upset. ‘It’s Samuel I’m thinking of, not me.’
‘Yes. Yes, of course you are. I just…’ Cassie stopped, sounding flustered. ‘You said you have a chance of a property of your own. Is that certain yet, or…’
‘It is,’ Kim confirmed, relieved that the guy who was letting it had rung her back. ‘It’s mine if I want it. It’s not Buckingham Palace, but it’s in a decent area. Even then, though, he won’t have much of a future, will he? Without a job I won’t be able to provide him with all the things children need, the things other kids have. Not just material things, but a stable family environment, a support network and a chance in life.’
Cassie stopped walking and turned to face her. ‘You could always come and stay with us,’ she suggested. ‘We have plenty of room, and I can’t think of a better use for it now than to make sure this baby has the best start in life he possibly can. It would give you a chance to have a life too. You might even consider us as adoptive parents for Samuel if…’
‘If what?’ Kim narrowed her eyes as Cassie trailed off. ‘I’m not trying to palm him off, Cassandra,’ she said firmly. ‘I wasn’t thinking about adoption because I don’t want the bother of looking after my own baby. It would crucify me to part with him. He’s my life. I love him with every fibre of my being.’
Cassie looked flustered. ‘I know, I just…’ She faltered, clearly at a loss how to respond.
Kim’s eyes filled up. ‘Is that really what you think? That it’s your money I’m after? That I’m trying to scam you, pleading poverty to get you to offer me payment to adopt him?’ She felt her cheeks flush furiously.
‘No!’ Cassie exclaimed. ‘I just thought that if you genuinely felt you couldn’t cope…’ She stopped, close to tears herself. ‘He’s my grandson, Kim. You must know that I would be desperate to keep him in my life. I was trying to offer you alternatives, that’s all. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to imply…’
Kim nodded slowly, accepting the apology. ‘Thank you for the offer to stay with you,’ she said, with a small smile. ‘It’s lovely of you, but if I’m going to be bringing up my son, with or without the support of his family, I need to establish a home, a space for myself and Samuel.’
Cassie almost wilted with relief. ‘You’re not going ahead with adoption then?’
Kim shook her head. ‘He’ll be