word sounded so ugly spoken aloud like that. It didn’t belong in this pretty room with this beautiful woman.
But I had to put this forward. Just because I had feelings for Penny didn’t mean I had to trap her for life. That wasn’t our plan. In the back of my mind, I thought about courting her properly, taking things more slowly. Going on actual dates. There was a big difference between thinking you could have a future with someone and marrying her tomorrow.
So I pulled a rumpled piece of paper from my pocket. It was the business card my mother had given me for her divorce lawyer—the man with the absurd name of Curtis L. Curtis. At the time I’d crushed it in my hand and tossed it, but this morning I found it on the floor under my desk. And I’d called him.
“Here’s how it can work,” I said to Penny. “Tomorrow, we get married like the agreement says. I already have the license and a Justice of the Peace ready to go. When it’s done, we’ll come to the holiday party. And after that, we’ll go to Colorado Springs.”
“Colorado Springs?” Penny’s voice was flat, and her expression had gone still.
But I plunged forward. “Yes. We’ll go see this man.” I held up the smoothed-out card. “His name is Curtis L. Curtis, and he’s willing to work over Christmas. For a fee.”
“Right,” Penny said. Her hand came to the button of her sweater and she twisted it, her engagement ring glinting in the light. “That way, the merger contract is fulfilled, but we don’t have to be married.”
“Right,” I said.
We were silent for a moment. Penny twisted her button again.
Then she sighed. “That makes…total sense.”
“It’s logical,” I said, my voice quiet.
“It’s really the best thing.” Penny nodded. “The best possible solution.”
“The best possible outcome for both of us.”
“For both of us,” she agreed. “Because we’re not in love or anything. I mean, I like you. I really do. And yesterday…”
I swallowed. “Yesterday was amazing.” I couldn’t lie about that. I could only tell her the truth.
Penny touched a palm to her cheek, like her skin was hot. “I agree. But marriage so soon would be too much for both of us.”
“It isn’t practical,” I said, watching her palm touch her cheek. I wanted that palm to be my palm.
“Definitely not practical. We barely know each other. And we’re opposites. It would never work.”
“Right.” I wanted to step forward and take her in my arms, like the hero of an old movie. I wanted to kiss her senseless here under these Christmas lights. Then I wanted to make love to her again until we didn’t have to think about these details anymore.
Had I just thought the words make love? Yes, I had, and I couldn’t even berate myself for it. Penny wasn’t a woman I wanted to bang or screw or fuck. She was a woman I wanted to spend hours, entire days, in bed with, making her come again and again.
But I wasn’t going to do that. Someday she’d find a man who would do that for her—she deserved it—but that guy wouldn’t be me.
She tucked a wayward curl behind her ear, and I watched as her expression gained resolve, her chin up, her shoulders back. There was never a challenge Penny Gold couldn’t handle.
“Okay,” she said to me. “When do we do this? The marriage part.”
“Seven o’clock tomorrow night,” I said. “Meet me at City Hall.”
Chapter 18
Penny
I wasn’t going to buy a dress. After all, this wasn’t a real wedding. If everything went as planned, I’d only be married a day or two. Until the divorce paperwork came through.
So a dress for a City Hall wedding for a marriage that wasn’t going to last wasn’t really necessary. But after that conversation with Wes, after I went home and poured a glass of wine and sorted through my clothes, I wanted to shred every single garment I had and toss it in a dumpster fire. So I decided to buy a dress.
I put on Sophie Kane’s red winter coat and a pair of boots and walked through the snowy parking lot of my building to the Kane Co van I’d borrowed. I’d only had half a glass of wine, so I got in the driver’s seat and started the van, turning the wipers on to brush the snow off the windshield. Under the red coat I was wearing black leggings and an old gray sweatshirt. My hair was twisted