to spare. My eyes narrowed—I couldn’t help it—as he pulled her in for a kiss.
I saw tongue.
Whatever, not my problem.
Not my problem at all that he’d called a girl during our so-called date and asked her to meet him. What if I had wanted to hang out?
Please, Gabs, when have you and Lex ever really hung out? Alone? Without your puke in his hair?
“Gabrielle?” Eugene frowned, then ran a hand through his thinning hair. He reminded me of one of those scraggly tomcats you pick up on the street. Damn, he’d never stray, would he? Even as a musician he didn’t have much going for him other than his kind smile and straight teeth, especially when you compared him to Lex.
He had nice eyes.
That’s what my life had come to.
Sitting at the bar with a man who looked like he’d still be holding my hand when I was eighty-eight years old and couldn’t find the chessboard even though it was right in front of me.
Crap, was I even making myself blind in my daydreams now?
“My, um, favorite song . . .” I bought some time by scratching my head and then motioning the bartender over and ordering a beer even though I seriously couldn’t afford it. Maybe Eugene would pay for it. “. . . is ‘Heartless Romance.’”
Eugene made a face, a very unattractive one that had me thinking about stupid felines again. “That’s the most unromantic song I have. It’s . . . sad.”
“What can I say?” I really tried to focus on him, but Lex was whispering into the girl’s long, sleek dark hair as she sat across his lap. His fingers inched up her thigh. I shivered. What would that feel like? To have those huge warm hands on me? Good. It would feel good. And I’d only let it happen for a few seconds, just so I could know what it was like, and then I’d slap him in the face.
Right?
“I, um . . .” Wait, what was I talking about? “I don’t do romance.” May as well tell Eugene I was a lesbian. Good one, Gabs.
I’m going to die alone.
And name my cat Eugene.
“Oh.” All of the excitement in his eyes just disappeared, right along with his smile. He fumbled with his IPA, pulling at the blue-and-white label, and then looked away from me.
I was that interesting.
Lex glanced over at us, one eyebrow doing that stupid judgmental arch that made me want to shave it off on an hourly basis.
“So!” I faked enthusiasm, my voice louder than usual. “When’s your next concert?”
He did a humble shrug and then smiled broadly, his black-rimmed glasses lifting off his face as his cheeks continued to pinch up with a wide smile. See? Adorable! “Tomorrow night, I’m playing at a club downtown. It’s a small set, but it should be good, you know? After all, it’s about the music.”
“Yes.” I nodded seriously. “The music . . . It’s all about the—” My jaw dropped open as the girl moved from Lex’s lap to the seat next to him and started slinking her dirty little hand up his pant leg. He smiled tightly, and then she cupped him.
In the middle of the freaking restaurant!
“Hey, you okay?” Eugene asked. “You look a bit . . . upset?”
“I’m fantastic!” I may have yelled it. “I just—Is it hot in here?” I tugged frantically at my T-shirt. “You were saying? The music?”
“Yes.” He clasped his hands together in front of his face, his fingertips touching his thin lips. “It’s so important that the music resonates with the fans, that it reaches deep inside—” He kept talking, but all I heard was “deep” and “inside,” and then my eyes locked on Lex’s as the girl started massaging him.
His smile was wicked.
I should have given him the finger.
But something shifted as his lips parted.
My chest felt heavy, my legs liquid as I watched her . . . feel him and watched him respond as her fingers dug into the front of his pants and rubbed up and down.
She was going to town.
But he was watching me.
The. Entire. Time.
“It’s like a caress,” Eugene said in a whisper. “The way the music floats into the atmosphere, almost like a sexual experience.”
I felt my body lean toward Lex, my eyes hooded, as he licked his lower lip, and then he bit down gently as his head fell back.
The girl kissed his neck.
Moment gone. I quickly looked away and started chugging my beer.
“Don’t you think?” Eugene