keep you safe.”
I shake my head, the few lingering pieces of confusion still kicking around in there, searching for answers. “Why? He couldn’t have known they would attack.”
“He isn’t worried about them. Those shitheads are small potatoes.”
“Then, who is he worried about?”
Casting his gaze from mine, the giant rolls his shoulders back. “Look, I’ve known Lucian a long time. Years. I’ve never seen him act this way toward another woman. Ever.”
“What way?”
“He’s crazy about you, Isa. Lost his mind, crazy. You should know, he won’t just let you go that easily. He’ll give you space for a while. But this isn’t over for him.”
“He’ll change his mind when he understands that it’s over for me. I can’t be with a man who murders people like it’s any other day. I don’t care if they’re bad people. It doesn’t give him the right to take someone’s life.”
“We try to be civilized, us human beings, but ultimately, we’re animals. All of us. And in the kingdom of animals, only the strongest survive.”
I lower my gaze and shake my head. “His world isn’t my world. Goodbye, Makaio.”
“You take care of yourself.”
I step past him and head toward the front door of the house. Hand to the doorknob, I watch him leave, and once he turns the corner, I open the door and find Aunt Midge sitting at the kitchen table, smoking a cigarette.
The whole house smells like tobacco and coffee, and my muscles tense with the thought that I’m going to have to slog through her sadness over my mother. I don’t feel what she feels, and I don’t want to.
I slide into the chair beside her. Her eyes are red and puffy, swollen from hours of crying, which has given rise to black circles. Unkempt hair sticks out around her face, the evidence of her having run her hands through it all morning. She looks like hell.
“I, um. Have to go ID the body later.” She flicks her cigarette against the edge of the ashtray and takes another drag of it. “I guess a morning jogger found her on the beach beneath the pier. They think she might’ve gotten high and drowned.”
With a sigh, I push away from the table and walk to the cupboard for a glass. From the fridge, I nab the carton of milk and pour some out, and keeping my back to Aunt Midge, I suck it down.
“That’s it? That’s all she gets from you?” The tension in her voice isn’t really directed at me, I know this. She’s angry and sad, and I’m going to be her emotional punching bag, the same way I was when Uncle Hal left her when I was fourteen.
“Are you really that surprised?”
Jaw cocked with a retort, she shakes her head. “You really are something, kid.”
Setting the glass down, I grip the edge of the counter to keep from throwing something across the room. “I’m sorry, I’m supposed to what? Be sad that she destroyed our lives, then continued to destroy hers until the very end?”
More tears slip down her cheeks, her lips pressed to a hard line as she smashes her cigarette out into the ashtray. “He didn’t want you. I know I’ll probably go to hell for sayin’ it, but it’s the truth.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Your dad.” Wiping her tears away, she sniffs and clasps her hands together. “The rotten bastard didn’t want you. She did, though. Whether you believe it, or not, she wanted you.” Her eyes seem to go out of focus, as she stares off as if she’s slipped into a scene in the past, and when her brows lower, I know it’s a place she doesn’t want to be, but I stay silent. Because I need to know. I’ve waited too long to hear this.
“If you would’ve asked her back then, she would’ve said she was in love with him. Maybe she was. They say there’s a bit of mystery in all of that, and I believe it. She got pregnant with you. I remember the day she and I sat in the bathroom. I’d gone out and bought the test, because if my parents found out, they would’ve tossed her to the sharks, the next time my pop went out to sea.” She laughs through the tears and shakes her head. “Not really, but she was scared, anyway. When the two lines showed up, I told her it could be wrong. I offered to take her to the clinic in town, have it confirmed