away is the hardest thing I’ve ever done. Every step I take from her makes me colder and colder, until I feel like I’ll never be warm again.
Chapter Fifty-One
Jo
When Edgar’s out the door, I drag myself to the bedroom and collapse on the bed. Now that I’m alone, the tears flow freely, wetting the soft sheets that smell like us.
The reminder of what we had is slicing me to ribbons.
I was so mad after dealing with Edgar’s mom, but I eventually realized it wasn’t really all Edgar’s fault. The woman’s obviously devious and mean. The tabloid articles probably went easy on her because they were afraid of getting sued.
But I wanted to talk about it with Edgar. The sex tape is a problem that still hasn’t been resolved, and I want to know what to do about his mother and her persistent stalking to get me to fix things between her and Edgar. I was going to tell Edgar that I prefer he inform his mom I don’t clean up other people’s messes, and if she burned a bridge, she can rebuild it herself.
Instead of all that, though…
Jo is perfect, precisely because I’ll never love her. Ever.
I don’t know who Edgar was talking to. I only heard his voice, and couldn’t make out what he was saying until I got closer to his office, where the door was ajar like always.
Does it matter who was on the phone with Edgar? He said what he said. He was dead serious, too. And contempt and disgust vibrated in every word. I couldn’t find my balance, like I was in the middle of an earthquake.
How could he have acted and spoken so much like Mr. Right? I can’t believe he faked the hot lust I felt when we made love. Or the warm friendliness he displayed toward my family.
Maybe this is just more proof I’m terrible at picking men.
People with bad fashion sense can go to the most exclusive boutiques and somehow still manage to leave with clothes that are all wrong for them. Maybe I’m the same way. There’s something fundamentally wrong with my man radar. I could be in the middle of anywhere—among homeless bums or the most eligible bachelors. I’ll still leave with somebody totally wrong.
Edgar being different from my exes doesn’t matter. Actually, it’s worse that Edgar’s so unlike any of the men I’ve ever dated. I had such high hopes, and now that they’ve been dashed, it hurts. Like my heart’s breaking into tiny pieces I might never be able to put together again.
Oh my God. I love Edgar even if he doesn’t reciprocate the emotion. And I feel like the most unlovable and stupid woman in the world to have fallen for a man who will never love me back.
Chapter Fifty-Two
Edgar
Instinct and habit are scary things. Instead of wondering where I should go, once I relinquished the penthouse to Jo, my lizard brain must’ve taken control, because I find myself in front of Tony’s mansion.
I sit in my car. Stare at the warm light glowing through windows. Wonder if Tony’s happy. He must be. He’s with Ivy, and they’re going to have babies. And she doesn’t look at him the way Jo looked at me.
Fuck.
I wish I could turn back time. I wish I’d never said what I said to Dad. I wish I’d never picked up his call in the first place.
I wish I’d resigned earlier and cut all ties with the goddamn family legacy.
All my money. All my influence. All my control. They should’ve been enough to put me in charge of my life.
But instead, what I have is a mess I can’t seem to figure out how to fix.
What a shit show.
What’s Jo doing now? She must be furious. Is she crying? Screaming? Does she have somebody who can be with her? Make her feel better? She shouldn’t be alone when she’s upset, but who is there to contact…?
Hugo? He’ll try to rip my balls off first, but he’s a good guy. He’ll have his cousin’s back, even while telling her I’m a bastard who doesn’t deserve her. I’d prefer not to expose Jo to an “Edgar is unworthy” diatribe, but it’s better than her being alone.
I pull out my phone, then pause. There’s a text from Yuna earlier that I miss—
Yuna! She won’t try to rip my balls off. And she knows all the details of the Blackwood family scandal. She can be Jo’s ally, but also perhaps convince Jo that I’m not